So, the season is fast approaching and it's time to get a little bile out. The preseason magazines are out, spring games are long since past, and the prospect of stadiums filled to capacity with screaming fans is tantalizingly close. But this blog isn't about the glories and revelry of sport. If it were, I'd be employed as a legitimate writer. And, as my bowl fiasco proved, this blog isn't very good at predicting outcomes of games of any sort.
No, this blog is about being angry about minuscule details regarding the second most popular form of football in the country. And the easiest targets for anger are (you guessed it!) coaches. So without further ado, here's an overview of all 22 coaching changes in college football between the end(-ish) of the 2009 season and the beginning of the 2010 season, each one with a prediction of how much more successful the new guy will be than his predecessor...
Akron
Departing Coach: J.D. Brookhart
Arriving Coach: Rob Ianello
Review: I have no idea why the heck I'm reviewing this one, though it's first because the list I found on wikipedia is listed in alphabetical order by school. Akron is barely a blip on the college football radar screen, whose last winning season came 5 years ago. The Zips play in the MAC, a conference with minimal importance, and they have the misfortune of being located in the gargantuan pit that is the state of Ohio. The advantage of the job? If the coach is a colossal failure, no one outside of Akron will care. Actually, since LeBron James bolted Ohio, no one in Akron will care either.
Likelihood of Success: Slim. Akron's not a Mecca for football fans anywhere, but improving on a 3-9 season might not be too rough, especially with Syracuse and Gardner-Webb to open the season. As stated above, however, even if he doesn't improve, no one will care.
Buffalo
Departing Coach: Turner Gill
Arriving Coach: Jeff Quinn
Review: It's good to see Turner Gill get a big time job, especially after he turned the Buffalo Bulls program around. It'll be interesting to see if Jeff Quinn can continue that level of success in the frozen north. Quinn's an interesting example. The guy has coached a grand total of 2 games: both of them bowl games coached in the wake of Brian Kelly leaving the school where he and Quinn were stationed. In fact, this will be the first season in 6 years where Kelly and Quinn aren't at the same school. Quinn's big problem, as near as I can tell, will be getting halfway decent players up to Buffalo. Turner Gill won more games in his last 3 seasons (18) than the team had won in the previous 9 years, and I have an unsettling feeling that hiring an offensive coordinator as the new head coach will hurt the Bulls. After all, last season they scored at least 17 points in all but three games, but they still finished 5-7. In other words, offense wasn't the problem, defense was. And, as experience has proven time and time again, offensive coordinators don't run good defenses. Duh.
Likelihood of Success: Again, slim. Buffalo, like Akron is obscure enough that a flameout here won't really condemn Quinn to a life of middling coaching jobs, but success will propel him to new heights (see Turner Gill). Once again on the bright side, Buffalo's not going to attract too much of a spotlight, so if Quinn crashes and burns there won't be a major amount of fallout on a national level.
Central Michigan
Departing Coach: Butch Jones
Arriving Coach: Dan Enos
Review: For its second straight coaching change Cincinnati has purloined a Central Michigan coach. Central Michigan really didn't suffer mightily after Brian Kelly left them, as Butch Jones led them to 3 straight winning seasons. Central Michigan has had winning seasons every year since 2005, which is a fairly major thing when one considers that they play in a non-major conference and they don't get much pull from the national media like Boise State and TCU. In all fairness, part of their lack of press is due to a lackluster schedule year in and year out, coupled with the fact that they do not dominate their conference every year like Boise does. Still, this school's in better shape than many of the others on this list, largely because of the fact that they aren't getting a new coach because they sucked last season. They're getting a new coach because they did well for three years (and because Brian Kelly exhibited loyalty to Cincinnati at a similar level that Benedict Arnold exhibited loyalty to America).
Likelihood of Success: Relatively high. Look for a dip in performance this season because of a lack of Dan LeFevour, the do-it-all quarterback who holds the NCAA record for touchdowns scored by a single player. Still, proper management coupled with a fan base that might just be tolerant enough to see a coach through a bad season or two means that CMU could very well stay near the top of the MAC in the coming years. This review, however, contained actual analysis, no cynicism, and almost no trace of anger. No worries, though, Cincinnati's next...
Cincinnati
Departing Coach: Brian Kelly
Arriving Coach: Butch Jones
Review: For every dynasty in college football there are at least 3 mini-dynasties who briefly take their place during down years. Michigan, Southern Cal, Notre Dame, Florida, etc. are examples of true dynasties. Hawaii's brief flareup at the top in 2007, those years where BYU was considered a legitimate National Championship contender, Georgia Tech once every 20 years (cheap shot!), and now Cincinnati. Cincy has done quite well in recent years, winning their pathetic little conference twice in a row. Prior to that win streak, however, the Bearcats were not just a middling team but, until 2004, they were a middling team in the non-BCS Conference USA. This past year Cincinnati came one second away from playing in the National Title game. It's fair to say that, along with that '07 Hawaii team, the 2009 Bearcats were among the most overrated teams in recent college football history, and if you'd like to argue that point with me, I will gently inform you that Cincy failed to go undefeated without the help of the officials and that they got skulled by Florida in their bowl game. I will also inform you that a pretty underwhelming Virginia Tech team beat the 2008 Big East Champion Bearcats in their bowl the previous season. So, frankly, it's around that time for the Bearcats to begin slowing down. Especially since the guy who led them to the top of their conference is gone for greener pastures (Ha ha it is a pun ha ha).
Likelihood of success: Moderate. Butch Jones is taking over a program that's had a good run, and it's hard to knock a pattern, since the same situation basically presented itself at Central Michigan around 3 years ago. Still, the temptation is there to say that Cincinnati, being in a conference that is in the BCS, will go downward. I'm not sure Jones is going to set the world aflame, and I have real problems believing that the Bearcats will compete once again for the National Title. Then again, they ARE in the Big East. So, flip a coin. Heads, Cincinnati's good, tails Cincinnati's bad.
East Carolina
Departing Coach: Skip Holtz
Arriving Coach: Ruffin McNeil
Review: It's always sad to see a coach leave the team he lead to national prominence. Case in point: ECU. This team was pretty much a backwater hole in the ground (much like Greenville, NC, which the Pirates are forced to call home) where coaches' careers went to die prior to Skip Holtz's arrival. Sure, it's fair to say that the Pirates had a comparatively down year in 2009 in light of the 2008 campaign where they beat #17 Virginia Tech and #8 West Virginia. But I don't think people in Greenville will be happy to see Skip leave. The guy left the school in a much better position than he found it in when he arrived in 2004, and I think he'll help out quite a bit at South Florida (more to come).
Likelihood of success: Well, it's hard to say. ECU has been boom and bust when it comes to coaches. The coach before Holtz was a nightmarishly bad coach. The coach before him led the Pirates to several upsets and more than a few bowl games. If the pattern holds, then ECU might be poised for a fall. Still, it's tough to argue that a team with 4 straight bowl appearances (not that that means much anymore) will be poised for a hard fall.
Florida State
Departing Coach: Bobby Bowden
Arriving Coach: Jimbo Fisher
Review: It's impossible to review the scope and scale of Bobby Bowden's coaching career. He deserved better than the end his career ultimately had, and he certainly deserves more than a few sentences on one of the 10 most unimportant blogs on the internet. (Least important blog on the Internet can be found here: link) Suffice it to say that Bowden's head coaching career started the year my mother was born, and he started coaching at Florida State in 1976, 10 years before my birth. Bowden's career did have some ups and downs, and the fact that he was fired after 2 National Championships, a bowl streak stretching back to 1981, and a string of winning seasons going back to 1977 is only indicative that he might have set the bar too high. Yes, his last few years were nowhere near as great as the highs of the 1990s. Yes, his teams often had all the discipline of a psych ward at San Quentin. Yes, he was forced to vacate 12 wins and his dream of defeating the corpse of Joe Paterno in the all-time wins category, but come on! Bowden's the last of a dying breed! Here we have a coach who spent 34 seasons in the same place! Some coaches (I am looking at you, pretty boy) have trouble staying anywhere for one season. So, seriously, hats off to Coach Bowden. For better or worse, the game won't be the same without one of the greats.
Likelihood of success: After all the oozing and gushing and sucking up to Bobby Bowden I just did, allow me to temper that with some good ol' fashioned hypocrisy. Because even though Bobby Bowden was one of the greats, he hasn't really been in charge down in Tallahassee for a few years. Sure, Bowden at least kept the illusion of coaching by wearing a headset, unlike Paterno, who wanders the sidelines (or booth) like an escapee from a retirement home. Someone should really reign him in before he breaks a hip. Oh, wait...
Hm. I had a point in here somewhere. Oh, yeah, Florida State. Look, Jimbo Fisher's been running that team for at least 3 years, ever since the time he was announced as "head coach in waiting." Thus, the "likelihood of success" is more of the same. There's an off chance that we'll see improvement in the Seminole program since the facade of Coach Bobby is gone. Look for a pickup in wins during the 2011 season, especially since the better teams in the ACC are senior heavy this year. So, I'm of the opinion that Florida State will be back atop the ACC shortly. As a Virginia Tech fan, however, I wouldn't complain if I was wrong. As a blogger, I won't complain if I'm right. Ha! I win either way! Moving on...
Kansas
Departing Coach: Mark Mangino
Arriving Coach: Turner Gill
Review: So Mark Mangino departed from Kansas, eh? I've mentioned my issues with Mangino being called out now instead of during the 12-1, Orange Bowl winning, 2007 season. In retrospect, it would seem that firing an abusive coach after his record went south on him was a theme this year (see also: Texas Tech) (It's further down the page, genius). Look, if abuse is happening at Virginia Tech, Florida, Alabama, Texas, etc. I want to know now. Because the reality of the situation is that most of the players on the field on Saturday will not spend their lives playing football at the professional level. College football is a game. And having a 12-1 record or even a National Championship while abusing players who aren't being paid to play is totally unacceptable. Nothing is worth the well-being of young men, many of whom wouldn't be in college if they couldn't run really fast while holding an oblong object in their right hand.
Coach Mangino apparently had a history of abusive behavior, a history that Kansas was apparently willing to ignore (or that players/boosters were unwilling to report) during the years he was bringing in $17 million in BCS money. I guess I should look on the bright side: he didn't eat anyone.
Likelihood of success: Turner Gill really turned around the Buffalo program, and it makes sense to think that he can succeed at Kansas. It will be interesting to see how he does with a program in a major conference, especially since (after this season) he won't have to worry about playing his old school Nebraska. Still, the key for Gill will be defeating the two giants of the Big 12: Texas and Oklahoma. The great news for Kansas? The only way they'll play OU or Texas is if they go to the Big 12 Championship game. This season's an excellent year for Kansas to try and find its groove under Turner Gill, especially since they only have Georgia Tech and Nebraska as major hurdles. To be fair, they're also coming off a year where they went 5-7 with a 1-7 record in conference play. And yet, in an uncharacteristic fit of optimism, I am ready to declare that Kansas will have a better year than last. There, I said it.
Kentucky
Departing Coach: Rich Brooks
Arriving Coach: Joker Phillips
Review: You know, it's hard to take a school that willingly hires a man named "Joker" to lead its football program seriously. It's also hard to take the whole "Head Coach in Waiting" thing seriously. If I were a coach in waiting who happened to be, say, an offensive coordinator at the school that was going to let me coach, I'd tank at my job so that I could be head coach sooner. Yes, this might backfire, but I have no idea why you'd tell a guy "Hey, you'll be head coach once this guy wrecks the program enough to get fired or decides to resign, the likelihood of which is fairly slim."
That said, Rich Brooks is leaving a program that's in reasonably good shape. They've made a bowl for the past 4 years, and Brooks has taken an historical loser and made it a, well, still nowhere near championship caliber team, but better than Vandy.
Likelihood of success: Here's the thing: Kentucky could magically become twice as good as they currently are and still not win their conference. Kentucky's in the SEC, a conference with more than its fair share of good teams. Add that to the fact that Kentucky's not in great recruiting territory and you have an ideal recipe for things to stay just the way they are...Yee-haw
OK, done with some of the big schools. Let's fast forward things a bit:
Louisiana-Lafayette
Departing Coach: Charlie Weatherbie
Arriving Coach: Todd Berry
Review: ULL is...bad. That's really the only way to describe them. They're even bad for a Sun Belt team, which is actually sort of an accomplishment.
Likelihood of success: They just hired a guy who went 5-36 in 3 and a half seasons at Army. You draw your own conclusions. The only good news is that no one expects anything.
Louisiana Tech
Departing Coach: Derek Dooley
Arriving Coach: Sonny Dykes
Review: Louisiana Tech isn't great, nor is it a great spot to try and pull in recruits, considering that only kids who couldn't get into a Big 12 or SEC school will consider playing for the Bulldogs. Plus, LTU has to compete with the elephant in the conference that is Boise State. Dooley did a decent job of holding the Bulldogs together, but aside from scaring LSU last season, there wasn't much worthy of note about LTU's 2008 season.
Likelihood of success: Considering that the only way to really be considered successful in a conference as tiny/obscure as the WAC is to either turn around a perpetual loser or win the conference championship, then the likelihood of success is quite slim here. LTU isn't the pit of awfulness, but they also have basically no chance of winning the WAC championship. So...enjoy your obscurity Coach Dykes.
Louisville
Departing Coach: Steve Kragthorpe
Arriving Coach: Charlie Strong
Review: Louisville's another one of those little mini-dynasties mentioned above. The Cardinals were one field goal away from being undefeated in 2006. That season seems light years away after 3 horrific seasons under Kragthorpe, whose last name I will really miss, as it sounds and looks like a name from some cheap Star Wars knockoff. But, to be frank, Louisville doesn't interest me that much, so let's just keep cruising right along to the stupid "likelihood of success" section, like I have any freakin' idea of what's going to happen.
Likelihood of success: Well, Bobby Petrino proved that Louisville can climb to great heights, especially in a conference with an automatic BCS berth and no great team. Mind you, Bobby Petrino is a backstabbing son of a you-know-what who probably sold his soul to the devil for that 2006 season and whose "payment" for his soul was that horrible season with the Falcons and an eternity of mediocrity at Arkansas. Oh, and I think that Charlie Strong can't do any worse than Kragthorpe did at Louisville, so I believe that if you define "success" as "a better season than the last 3" then the likelihood of success here is high. Just don't look for some sort of mega-season with a great run leading to a national title. That'd be absurd.
Marshall
Departing Coach: Mark Snyder
Arriving Coach: Doc Holliday
Review: This is going to sound harsh, but most college students these days would not know anything at all about Marshall football were it not for the 1970 plane crash that killed 75 people, 35 of whom were members of the team. Actually, thanks to the general stupidity, hedonism, and ignorance that have gripped American collegiate culture in recent years, I think it's actually more fair to say that most college students wouldn't know about Marshall football were it not for the movie about the 1970 plane crash. Marshall, after some serious success in the early 1990s, moved up to D-1A and, thus, obscurity, in 1997. Since then they've had some decent seasons, but the overall theme (especially in recent years) has been mediocrity. Snyder lost his job mostly due to his overall record (22-37) rather than a particularly bad 2009 season. Oh, wait, he "resigned." And if you buy that, then I've got some great beachfront property in North Dakota that I would love to sell you.
Likelihood of Success: Well, the good news for Doc Holliday is that he has a kickin' nickname. Wait, I mean, he has a fairly bad conference sitting in front of him. ECU has a new head coach, Houston can't play defense, and Southern Miss is a shell of what they once were in C-USA. Mind you, Marshall isn't great, and it's unfair to expect anything more than a repeat of 2009's .500 year. I would still say Marshall might be on the upswing for the next few year, just because new blood and a coach with a history of being around decent to good teams is a recipe for success. To be fair, 5 years ago I would have written the same thing about Charlie Weis, so what the heck to I know?
Memphis
Departing Coach: Tommy West
Arriving Coach: Larry Porter
Review: Do you care? No, I can virtually assure you that you don't. Even if you think you care, you really don't. Memphis wasn't bad (read: better than 3-9) in 2007 and 2008, but their 2009 season was really really bad. So they hired a new coach. I mean, it's really that simple
Likelihood of success: Is the new coach's name John Calipari? Can he unscrupulously bring talent to an otherwise barely footnote worthy school? Well, since the answers to those questions are: "No" and "Probably not," I'd say the odds of Memphis appearing as anything more as a blip on the college football radar are slim to none. Oh, but at least the football team won't have to forfeit its Final Four appearance a few years down the road.
Notre Dame
Departing Coach: Charlie Weis
Arriving Coach: Brian Kelly
Review: It's hard to feel sorry for Charlie Weis. The man made millions of dollars doing a mediocre job at a school where (in theory) doing a good job shouldn't be as difficult as having 6 consecutive 10 win seasons at a school in an obscure little hovel in southwestern Virginia (Coach Beamer, I'll take cash or check). That said, it's also hard not to feel sorry for Charlie Weis. The man lived for at least 4 years with his job being threatened. He was frequently ripped by the national media, and was occasionally burned in effigy by this blogger (<-not true, added for humor). He was just expected to have a national title at a school that hasn't won an outright national championship since 1988. I was 2 at that point in time. Colorado and Washington have won a National Championship more recently than Notre Dame. Sorry, but it's just not fair to expect that sort of thing from any coach at any school at any time. National Championships in a sport as competitive as college football don't just fall out of the sky! Oh, well. Charlie's back in the NFL and dang it I'm tired so let's move to the surreptitious part of this little overly long thing:
Likelihood of success: Look, the last 3 coaches at Notre Dame have been busts. Bob Davie led Notre Dame through 5 seasons of mediocrity before getting fired. Tyrone Willingham (who many people thought got a bad rap because he was black until he screwed over Washington and everyone realized he just sucks at coaching) and Charlie Weis both disappointed, and Notre Dame hasn't had a "Notre Dame-like" (<-Read "good") season since 2006, and they haven't won a bowl that more than 17 hula dancers care about since 1993. It is very difficult to rebuild any program to national prominence after 3 straight lemon coaches, so Brian Kelly certainly has his work cut out for him. But if anyone's cut out to lead the Irish out of the wasteland then it's Kelly. Kelly still has yet to prove he can perform in a major bowl game, but thanks to the fact that Notre Dame is independent, he can make it all the way to the BCS playing the likes of Navy and Washington State. I'd say look for the Irish to bounce back from punchline status in the 2011 season after a fairly rocky 2010 year.
San Jose State
Departing Coach: Dick Tomey
Arriving Coach: Mike MacIntyre
Review: Dear reader, if I had put two realistic-looking, but fake, names up there in the Departing/Arriving Coach blurbs, would you have known? If I had put "Jackson Hargreaves" and "Shawn McGrady" up there you would have had no idea. That is the level of relevance of San Jose State football right now.
Likelihood of success: SJSU is in the WAC, meaning they have to overcome the Boise State hurdle. On the bright side, unlike the previously mentioned and maligned Louisiana Tech Bulldogs, they had an awful 2009, going 2-10. Thus, if Coach MacIntyre is able to go, say, 5-7, he'll put himself on the radar for a much better job. Which would really be good, because coaching for San Jose State is going to suck.
South Florida
Departing Coach: Jim Leavitt
Arriving Coach: Skip Holtz
Review: South Florida has lost the only football coach it has ever known. Jim Leavitt led the team from the time it was a theoretical entity up to the 2009 season. During that time the squad went from 1-AA to 1-A (still not FBS) and joined an Automatic Qualifying conference. In 2007, the Bulls rose to #2 in the BCS rankings before plummeting back down to a 9-4 season. Ever since then South Florida has hung around the middle of the Big East, which would be more of an accomplishment if it weren't the Big East. But then, tragedy struck. Well, more accurately, Coach Leavitt struck. A player. In the locker room. Then he lied about it. So, yeah. Kinda awkward there. Leavitt was unceremoniously dropped from the team he had basically created, and South Florida was left looking for a coach, whom they found in the form of Skip Holtz.
Likelihood of success: Look, never bet against the Holtz's. Yes, I do have some sort of weird "thing" about Lou Holtz, but seriously, Lou is one of the all-time greats, and Skip turned ECU around after two consecutive seasons that can only be described as "godawful". The pieces are all in place at South Florida: Good coach, reasonably good players, good recruiting grounds, and a weak conference. Look for USF in a BCS bowl sometime very, very soon. Not this year though. This year they'll go 9-3 and play in some mid-level bowl game.
Tennessee
Departing Coach: Lane Kiffin
Arriving Coach: Derek Dooley
Review: One mediocre season after taking over the Big Orange, Lane Kiffin bolts in uber-weasel fashion. Sorry, but I can't say anything positive about the way Kiffin left and tried to take some of his best recruits with him. No worries, though, as Lane and his little band of ship-jumpers will spend 2 glorious bowl-free years at Southern Cal watching schools like Wyoming get to have all the post-season fun. Tennessee, meanwhile, has a mess to clean up, and one can only hope that the fans in Knoxville are willing to sit through at least one more season of mediocrity before getting some results
Likelihood of success: Dooley's dad had success at Georgia. So much so that it might create unfair expectations for his son. The big challenge at Tennessee is to get over the hump in the SEC. Being a middle of the road SEC team is akin to being a good ACC or Big East team. The problem is beating Florida or Alabama or LSU. The likelihood of that happening in the near future? Not good...
Texas Tech
Departing Coach: Mike Leach
Arriving Coach: Tommy Tuberville
Review: It's good to see Tuberville getting a job. It's even better to see a guy who locked a kid with a concussion in a closet gone. To be fair, like most twentysomethings I get most of my sports from ESPN, meaning that the reports were probably a bit biased considering the kid in question was analyst Craig James' son. The counterpoint to that is that Leach's "walk the plank" attitude probably merited a firing before he stupidly abused a kid with direct access to the world's largest sports media outlet. Oops.
Likelihood of success: Well, Tuberville has taken over a team that ran an unbelievably pass heavy spread for the last 9 years or so, and the last time he was on a team running a spread offense didn't go so hot. As a matter of fact, the little experiment cost him his job eventually. That said, Tuberville's genius lies in defense, an area in which most Big 12 teams are sorely lacking. The result? Well, it could mean that given enough time to retool the team, Tuberville could have great success. The only other team to claim to be defense heavy in the Big 12 in recent years has been the Nebraska Cornhuskers, a team that went from punching bag to one-second away from the BCS in the span of 2 seasons. This year could be rough in Lubbock, but given enough time Tuberville will turn it around.
UNLV
Departing Coach: Mike Sanford
Arriving Coach: Bobby Hauck
Review: UNLV isn't even popular in its own city, so the advantage here is that sucking won't attract too much attention. The disadvantage of coaching in Las Vegas, obviously, is getting a bunch of teenagers and 20-22 year olds to concentrate on football in a city renowned for drinking, gambling, and cheap buffets. Sanford couldn't do it; he went 16-43, having one season with more than 4 wins in 5 years at the school.
Likelihood of success: Not good at all. As if the distractions of Las Vegas weren't enough, the coaching staff also has to compete with TCU and Utah and BYU in what easily the best non-Automatic Qualifying conference. So, good luck Coach Hauck. If you go to the casinos alot, I'd bet on whoever's playing UNLV that week...
USC
Departing Weasel Scumbag: Pete Carroll
Arriving Weasel Scumbag: Lane Kiffin
Review: Since most of the last post was about this, and since this post is like 18 pages long, I am of the opinion that I can be fairly light on this topic right now. Suffice it to say that Southern Cal was caught cheating, and Pete, being a rat, jumped off of the sinking ship as quickly as he could. The one tiny bit of vindication here is that his protege is now stuck with the sanctions for cheating that the NCAA leveled against the school. Which seems a bit odd, as Pete got off completely free. Well, he does have to coach the Seahawks now. That might be punishment enough.
Likelihood of success: None. When you're used to competing for national titles and conference championships, a 2 year ban on postseason play means that you've already failed in 2010 and 2011. Check back slightly before the end of the world in 2012.
Virginia
Departing Coach: Al Groh
Arriving Coach: Mike London
Review: Coach Groh bowed out from the University of Virginia at Charlottesville with extreme grace. Probably more grace than was deserved by those tie wearing snobs. (Sorry, Hokie fan writing, excuse the bias.) Coach Groh will be missed by Virginia Tech fans, not least because the Hokies had an 8-1 record against him. On a serious note, Coach Groh was amazingly gracious and kind to Virginia Tech after the horrific events of April 16, 2007. He never could lead Virginia to an ACC championship, and his coaching was sub-par for most of his career at UVa. He's an alright guy, though, and for that he will truly be missed.
Likelihood of success: The ACC isn't overly good, and Mike London led the Richmond Spiders to their only NCAA Championship thus far. Putting two and two together, here, UVa has a very real chance to be good in the near future. Virginia will still have to get the pieces in place, as their defense bled points for most of the 2009 season. London, however, is a defensive guy, so look for the Cavaliers to make noise in the ACC sometime around 2011 or 2012.
Western Kentucky
Departing Coach: David Elson
Arriving Coach: Willie Taggart
Review: THIS is how I have to finish my labor of love? Well, crap. OK, here: WKU was a good 1-AA team that moved up and immediately did one thing: lose. They lost frequently, and they haven't won a game since September of 2008. Color me unimpressed.
Likelihood of success: Well, the good news here is that you can't do any worse than last season. Don't look for Western Kentucky in the polls. Actually, don't look for Western Kentucky at all, as doing so would require you to go to Kentucky...
Aaaaand that's it. An overview of all 22 of the coaching changes in college football between the 2009 and 2010 seasons. Hope it's enough to tide you over until someone writes something stupid for me to mock before the season starts...
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Back once more, with the seething anger you want!
Hello, dear reader(s). Just a quick heads up on some things:
ONE: Sorry for the lack of bowl rundown. Between my work computer going into the shop, my home computer breaking, abject laziness, and the fact that I'm not paid by anyone to do this, there was really no way it was getting done. Which is a pity because I finished 17-17 in my bowl picks. Yeah! In your face! Flipping a coin would have given you roughly the same results as my crappy bowl predictions!
TWO: Gotta do a rundown of the destruction of conferences, specifically the Big 12's dissolution and the parts of that conference heading to conferences that make no sense for them to join. Texas in the Pac-10? Nebraska in the Big 10, which now has 12 teams AT LEAST?! What the heck is this?! (I'm getting ahead of myself, football blogging season has just started.)
THREE: I'll try to do something involving the coaching carousel around the country. Plenty of fun to be had there, especially at Notre Dame, Cincinnati, UVa, Tennessee and Southern Cal.
FOUR: Speaking of Southern Cal...
It seems vaguely appropriate that the team that I despise with all of the enthusiasm I can muster has finally been punished for their misdeeds. Vindictive of me? Sure, but let's all be honest with ourselves: Almost every program in major college sports that has a legitimate shot of winning a championship cheats. Virginia Tech probably does. Florida almost certainly does. Iowa State probably does not, but Iowa State has a horrible football team. The issues I have with the University of Southern California are not relative to what they've done with recruiting, because in modern college football recruiting violations are so prevalent as to be utterly unremarkable.
No, what I hate about Southern Cal is their attitude. The idea that somehow they have "earned" their place among college football's elite simply by virtue of location. The concept that 100% of their players go on to have illustrious professional careers simply because they spent 4 years snuffing out inferior conference competition, mediocre non-conference competition, and one good team per year in their bowl game. The idea that Pete Carroll is some sort of brilliant coach because he took an historically good program in a rich recruiting ground and kept winning with it. The way people describe their program as having "swagger." The way the media panders to them, and the rare occasions that the media does acknowledge that Southern Cal isn't the greatest football team in the country they are immediately accused of "East Coast Bias." The "Bush Push," which was illegal, this call against Virginia Tech's Josh Hyman, which is still the single worst offensive pass interference call in football history. Pete Carroll's hair. Lane Kiffin leaving Tennessee in a horrible state after one mediocre year to coach the Mustard and Ketchup. That, among a host of other reasons, is why I hate Southern California.
Now that you have a decent comprehension of where I stand, here's some analysis: The NCAA sanctions were not harsh enough. In this case, the school had been thumbing its nose at the NCAA for years and lying to its recruits, telling them to come to the school, telling them that they were in the clear from NCAA sanctions. These recruits should have the right to transfer to another school, perhaps one that will give them the opportunity to play in a bowl game during one of their first two years at school. Plus, consider the seniors and juniors who, having missed their chance to jump to the NFL like their coach (more to come on that) are stuck spending the last years of their college career with no chance of going to a bowl or of hoisting a national championship trophy. Even if Southern Cal runs the table the next two years (they won't, but work with me here) they will still not be able to play for a national title. Aside from making the school money, the next two seasons will have little to no meaning. The athletes should have the opportunity to leave. If college football is "about the kids" as the NCAA is always so quick to claim, then the kids should be given a chance to give meaning to the 2010 and 2011 seasons. (NOTE: In the time since I typed this, it's come out that Juniors and Seniors will be allowed to transfer without the required one year of "sit out" time. Mind you, these are the Juniors and Seniors who led Southern Cal to their worst season since 2001, so...) (Plus, the Freshmen and Sophomores are still getting screwed...)
The school needs to be stripped of 5 seasons of post-season participation. That way no athlete who was in any way tainted by this scandal can play for the tainted school that tainted them. Tainted. Fun word to type.
Seriously, though, the hiring of Lane Kiffin was a horrible choice for a variety of reasons. One of the ringleaders of the circus that led to this whole affair is now back in charge of said circus. Kiffin's paying his atonement in the form of sanctions during his first two years, yet the school's punishment needs to be elevated, the better to teach boosters and crazy fans who write blogs about football an adequate lesson.
I know that sounds like the harshest of mentalities to take, but think about it: Most college athletes, even from big-name schools, don't go on to have illustrious careers. Most of them don't go on to have careers at all! For all the hype that its players get, USC football's pro track record is no better than many other schools around the nation. If you don't believe me, go to the local Wal-Mart and talk to John David Booty. If he's not working today, try finding Todd Marinovich.
The most egregious bit is that the man who built this monster is escaping basically scot free. I am, of course, referring to the Silver Fox: Mr. Peter Clay Carroll. Pete has gotten away with the murder of Southern Cal football, and he's not even sorry about it! Here's a video from his YouTube channel. (Which, by the way, PETE CARROLL has a YouTube Channel?! I could write a whole post just about that!) Watch that video and come back. I'll wait here...
...OK, so raise your hand if you believed that. If you raised your hand, then I am shocked. Because I did not know that you read this blog, Mr. Carroll. If you did not raise your hand, then you have a brain stem. "The University didn't know, we didn't know." Look, man, I'll buy that you don't know a tailback has a history of robbing stores. I'll buy that you can't keep tabs on 100 athletes at the same time. But the player at the crux of this debate is REGGIE FRIGGIN' BUSH! One of the best running backs in college football history, certainly one of the best to come through Southern Cal. If you're not keeping tabs on the recruitment of your highest profile player then you are a horrible, horrible coach. This denial is amazing. If Pete flames out at the NFL coaching level, he could easily have a career in politics. Never once during the 2 minutes of drivel you have just watched did Pete actually apologize or take responsibility for his actions. We do get an "I feel terrible" around the 1:50 mark, but that doesn't count.
In conclusion (though this topic may get revisited between now and August) this just shows the dark side of college football. Drugs have withdrawal symptoms, addiction, and life-ruining powers. College football has recruiting. Here's hoping that the season arrives soon...
ONE: Sorry for the lack of bowl rundown. Between my work computer going into the shop, my home computer breaking, abject laziness, and the fact that I'm not paid by anyone to do this, there was really no way it was getting done. Which is a pity because I finished 17-17 in my bowl picks. Yeah! In your face! Flipping a coin would have given you roughly the same results as my crappy bowl predictions!
TWO: Gotta do a rundown of the destruction of conferences, specifically the Big 12's dissolution and the parts of that conference heading to conferences that make no sense for them to join. Texas in the Pac-10? Nebraska in the Big 10, which now has 12 teams AT LEAST?! What the heck is this?! (I'm getting ahead of myself, football blogging season has just started.)
THREE: I'll try to do something involving the coaching carousel around the country. Plenty of fun to be had there, especially at Notre Dame, Cincinnati, UVa, Tennessee and Southern Cal.
FOUR: Speaking of Southern Cal...
It seems vaguely appropriate that the team that I despise with all of the enthusiasm I can muster has finally been punished for their misdeeds. Vindictive of me? Sure, but let's all be honest with ourselves: Almost every program in major college sports that has a legitimate shot of winning a championship cheats. Virginia Tech probably does. Florida almost certainly does. Iowa State probably does not, but Iowa State has a horrible football team. The issues I have with the University of Southern California are not relative to what they've done with recruiting, because in modern college football recruiting violations are so prevalent as to be utterly unremarkable.
No, what I hate about Southern Cal is their attitude. The idea that somehow they have "earned" their place among college football's elite simply by virtue of location. The concept that 100% of their players go on to have illustrious professional careers simply because they spent 4 years snuffing out inferior conference competition, mediocre non-conference competition, and one good team per year in their bowl game. The idea that Pete Carroll is some sort of brilliant coach because he took an historically good program in a rich recruiting ground and kept winning with it. The way people describe their program as having "swagger." The way the media panders to them, and the rare occasions that the media does acknowledge that Southern Cal isn't the greatest football team in the country they are immediately accused of "East Coast Bias." The "Bush Push," which was illegal, this call against Virginia Tech's Josh Hyman, which is still the single worst offensive pass interference call in football history. Pete Carroll's hair. Lane Kiffin leaving Tennessee in a horrible state after one mediocre year to coach the Mustard and Ketchup. That, among a host of other reasons, is why I hate Southern California.
Now that you have a decent comprehension of where I stand, here's some analysis: The NCAA sanctions were not harsh enough. In this case, the school had been thumbing its nose at the NCAA for years and lying to its recruits, telling them to come to the school, telling them that they were in the clear from NCAA sanctions. These recruits should have the right to transfer to another school, perhaps one that will give them the opportunity to play in a bowl game during one of their first two years at school. Plus, consider the seniors and juniors who, having missed their chance to jump to the NFL like their coach (more to come on that) are stuck spending the last years of their college career with no chance of going to a bowl or of hoisting a national championship trophy. Even if Southern Cal runs the table the next two years (they won't, but work with me here) they will still not be able to play for a national title. Aside from making the school money, the next two seasons will have little to no meaning. The athletes should have the opportunity to leave. If college football is "about the kids" as the NCAA is always so quick to claim, then the kids should be given a chance to give meaning to the 2010 and 2011 seasons. (NOTE: In the time since I typed this, it's come out that Juniors and Seniors will be allowed to transfer without the required one year of "sit out" time. Mind you, these are the Juniors and Seniors who led Southern Cal to their worst season since 2001, so...) (Plus, the Freshmen and Sophomores are still getting screwed...)
The school needs to be stripped of 5 seasons of post-season participation. That way no athlete who was in any way tainted by this scandal can play for the tainted school that tainted them. Tainted. Fun word to type.
Seriously, though, the hiring of Lane Kiffin was a horrible choice for a variety of reasons. One of the ringleaders of the circus that led to this whole affair is now back in charge of said circus. Kiffin's paying his atonement in the form of sanctions during his first two years, yet the school's punishment needs to be elevated, the better to teach boosters and crazy fans who write blogs about football an adequate lesson.
I know that sounds like the harshest of mentalities to take, but think about it: Most college athletes, even from big-name schools, don't go on to have illustrious careers. Most of them don't go on to have careers at all! For all the hype that its players get, USC football's pro track record is no better than many other schools around the nation. If you don't believe me, go to the local Wal-Mart and talk to John David Booty. If he's not working today, try finding Todd Marinovich.
The most egregious bit is that the man who built this monster is escaping basically scot free. I am, of course, referring to the Silver Fox: Mr. Peter Clay Carroll. Pete has gotten away with the murder of Southern Cal football, and he's not even sorry about it! Here's a video from his YouTube channel. (Which, by the way, PETE CARROLL has a YouTube Channel?! I could write a whole post just about that!) Watch that video and come back. I'll wait here...
...OK, so raise your hand if you believed that. If you raised your hand, then I am shocked. Because I did not know that you read this blog, Mr. Carroll. If you did not raise your hand, then you have a brain stem. "The University didn't know, we didn't know." Look, man, I'll buy that you don't know a tailback has a history of robbing stores. I'll buy that you can't keep tabs on 100 athletes at the same time. But the player at the crux of this debate is REGGIE FRIGGIN' BUSH! One of the best running backs in college football history, certainly one of the best to come through Southern Cal. If you're not keeping tabs on the recruitment of your highest profile player then you are a horrible, horrible coach. This denial is amazing. If Pete flames out at the NFL coaching level, he could easily have a career in politics. Never once during the 2 minutes of drivel you have just watched did Pete actually apologize or take responsibility for his actions. We do get an "I feel terrible" around the 1:50 mark, but that doesn't count.
In conclusion (though this topic may get revisited between now and August) this just shows the dark side of college football. Drugs have withdrawal symptoms, addiction, and life-ruining powers. College football has recruiting. Here's hoping that the season arrives soon...
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Final Bowl (P)Review
2 bowls remain. "But I thought there was only the national championship!" you say. Well that is because you are ignorant! Oh, wait. Probably shouldn't insult the readers. But there are two games remaining. One is highly important. The other one is the...
January 6, 2010
GMAC Bowl
Central Michigan vs. Troy
Oi. You'd think that someone, somewhere would say something about this bowl being the second to last one available. Seriously, Central Michigan and Troy? If you did not attend those schools, what is the impetus to watch the game? Seriously, the BCS games are all-but done, the season is winding to a pretty exciting climax, and we get a MAC team and a Sun Belt team. Readers! How many of you knew that those conferences existed? Those of you who did know, how many teams from those conferences can you name? The lone reason to watch this game (as ESPN has probably shoved down your throat multiple times by this juncture) is Central Michigan QB Dan LeFevour. LeFevour has tossed for 3000 yards and run for 700 this season. That's pretty good, even by MAC standards.
Should I watch this game? Well, Central Michigan has a good quarterback, Troy's got a good offense through the air, and this game should feature a boatload of points. So this game has all of that working for it. Know what's working against it?
IT'S FRIGGIN' CENTRAL MICHIGAN AND TROY!!!!
Jeez. Read a book or something. (NOTE: The lengthy archive of this blog probably qualifies by now...)
CFR Pick: Central Michigan. And no, I won't be watching this one.
January 7, 2010
BCS National Championship Game
#2 Texas vs. #1 Alabama
Well, it's all lead up to this. Two undefeated teams that the computers liked better than the other three duking it out for that ugly crystal football (see below)
So how did we get here? Texas went undefeated in the Big 12, running into some friction in their final two games against Texas A&M and Nebraska. Texas hasn't faced too many big tests this season, and they're up against a very very tough team from Tuscaloosa.
For what it's worth, Alabama's looked really good this season. They ran all over Virginia Tech (score said there was a 10 point difference, trust me, it should have been much greater), went undefeated in a very good SEC, survived a very real scare against Tennessee, and beat the tar out of former #1 Florida during the SEC Championship game.
Now, I've griped about Texas's schedule all season, and Alabama's non-conference other than Virginia Tech was a complete joke (Florida International, Chattanooga, North Texas). I believe Mack Brown possesses almost no loyalty to his school (ask a Carolina football fan, if you can find one) (good luck with that, by the way) and that Nick Saban could, in fact, be the devil (see below:)
With that said, I believe that this is the best possible National Championship matchup. Cincinnati played in an awful conference and Florida made them pay, TCU and Boise State play in lesser conferences, Florida itself relied on help from the officials all season long (not to mention got beat by Alabama), and everyone else had at least 2 losses. So the BCS did get a pretty good national championship matchup. Congrats, I guess. We still lost the excitement that a playoff would have provided.
Should I watch this game? If you don't watch the college football championship, then why would you be here on College Football Review?! Just throwing it out there. Yes, you should watch this game. Heck, it might turn out to be good!
CFR Pick: Alabama. Their defense is solid, and their offense sucks much less than Nebraska's did. And Nebraska only lost to Texas by one. Mind you, Texas has been hearing about that ever since it happened, so we'll have to see how it goes. Still, gotta pick Alabama for the win.
That's all for the previews...reviews come later. Enjoy the games!
January 6, 2010
GMAC Bowl
Central Michigan vs. Troy
Oi. You'd think that someone, somewhere would say something about this bowl being the second to last one available. Seriously, Central Michigan and Troy? If you did not attend those schools, what is the impetus to watch the game? Seriously, the BCS games are all-but done, the season is winding to a pretty exciting climax, and we get a MAC team and a Sun Belt team. Readers! How many of you knew that those conferences existed? Those of you who did know, how many teams from those conferences can you name? The lone reason to watch this game (as ESPN has probably shoved down your throat multiple times by this juncture) is Central Michigan QB Dan LeFevour. LeFevour has tossed for 3000 yards and run for 700 this season. That's pretty good, even by MAC standards.
Should I watch this game? Well, Central Michigan has a good quarterback, Troy's got a good offense through the air, and this game should feature a boatload of points. So this game has all of that working for it. Know what's working against it?
IT'S FRIGGIN' CENTRAL MICHIGAN AND TROY!!!!
Jeez. Read a book or something. (NOTE: The lengthy archive of this blog probably qualifies by now...)
CFR Pick: Central Michigan. And no, I won't be watching this one.
January 7, 2010
BCS National Championship Game
#2 Texas vs. #1 Alabama
Well, it's all lead up to this. Two undefeated teams that the computers liked better than the other three duking it out for that ugly crystal football (see below)
So how did we get here? Texas went undefeated in the Big 12, running into some friction in their final two games against Texas A&M and Nebraska. Texas hasn't faced too many big tests this season, and they're up against a very very tough team from Tuscaloosa.
For what it's worth, Alabama's looked really good this season. They ran all over Virginia Tech (score said there was a 10 point difference, trust me, it should have been much greater), went undefeated in a very good SEC, survived a very real scare against Tennessee, and beat the tar out of former #1 Florida during the SEC Championship game.
Now, I've griped about Texas's schedule all season, and Alabama's non-conference other than Virginia Tech was a complete joke (Florida International, Chattanooga, North Texas). I believe Mack Brown possesses almost no loyalty to his school (ask a Carolina football fan, if you can find one) (good luck with that, by the way) and that Nick Saban could, in fact, be the devil (see below:)
With that said, I believe that this is the best possible National Championship matchup. Cincinnati played in an awful conference and Florida made them pay, TCU and Boise State play in lesser conferences, Florida itself relied on help from the officials all season long (not to mention got beat by Alabama), and everyone else had at least 2 losses. So the BCS did get a pretty good national championship matchup. Congrats, I guess. We still lost the excitement that a playoff would have provided.
Should I watch this game? If you don't watch the college football championship, then why would you be here on College Football Review?! Just throwing it out there. Yes, you should watch this game. Heck, it might turn out to be good!
CFR Pick: Alabama. Their defense is solid, and their offense sucks much less than Nebraska's did. And Nebraska only lost to Texas by one. Mind you, Texas has been hearing about that ever since it happened, so we'll have to see how it goes. Still, gotta pick Alabama for the win.
That's all for the previews...reviews come later. Enjoy the games!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Orange Bowl (P)Review
And the BCS rolls on, eh? Tonight, we have the Orange Bowl, featuring the ACC champions, Georgia Tech, and the Big 10 at-large team, Iowa. Oh, I forgot the stupid bold and color thing that I do. Wait a sec...
FedEx Orange Bowl
Georgia Tech vs. Iowa
OK, look. Why is Iowa in a BCS Bowl? The simple answer is because no one else could be found. Mark my words: This team has no business in a BCS Bowl. Even if this Iowa team wins tonight, I cannot vindicate their presence in this bowl with any argument. The only reason they're in is, as stated, because of their "competition" for the last at-large bid...
Should I watch this game? Yes, because Georgia Tech's option is a blast to watch, just pray that you don't watch them throw the ball. Because that's when things get ugly. Plus, since Iowa lives by the skin of its teeth, this may yet be an exciting game.
CFR Pick: I'm going with Georgia Tech. The option relies on speed, and I think that's something that the Hawkeyes lack. To be fair, the Big 11 is on the up and up, and they've looked quite dynamic this bowl season. Still, the Yellow Jackets have only done poorly in two games this year, and I think the loss to Georgia may have galvanized the rage of super-jerkish coach Paul Johnson.
FedEx Orange Bowl
Georgia Tech vs. Iowa
OK, look. Why is Iowa in a BCS Bowl? The simple answer is because no one else could be found. Mark my words: This team has no business in a BCS Bowl. Even if this Iowa team wins tonight, I cannot vindicate their presence in this bowl with any argument. The only reason they're in is, as stated, because of their "competition" for the last at-large bid...
- #11 Penn State: A team that played 3 good teams (counting bowl opponent LSU) and lost to 2 of them. One of those losses? Iowa.
- #12 Virginia Tech: A 3-loss team, including a stinker against UNC. Plus, since you can't have ACC teams playing each other in a BCS bowl, you'd have to change up the matchups, which would lead to TCU and Boise playing big schools. Anarchy ensues.
- #13 LSU: 3 losses against legitimate programs, but poorly timed losses since they were all late in the season. Losing 2 of their last 4 didn't help, nor did the overtime win against Arkansas. Lastly, that's 3 SEC teams in BCS games. All told, though, LSU would have made the most sense to send to the BCS.
- #14 Miami: Beat Georgia Tech, but got smacked by Virginia Tech, lost a heartbreaker to Clemson, and suffered a crummy loss to UNC. As the ACC is considered a weak conference (not without cause) it doesn't make much sense to send 2 ACC teams. Plus Miami was ranked lower than Virginia Tech, also giving cause to send Miami to a lesser bowl.
- #15 BYU: 3 non-AQ teams in the BCS? Puh-leeze. Plus, BYU got killed by Florida State, in a loss that still hurts, even in January.
Should I watch this game? Yes, because Georgia Tech's option is a blast to watch, just pray that you don't watch them throw the ball. Because that's when things get ugly. Plus, since Iowa lives by the skin of its teeth, this may yet be an exciting game.
CFR Pick: I'm going with Georgia Tech. The option relies on speed, and I think that's something that the Hawkeyes lack. To be fair, the Big 11 is on the up and up, and they've looked quite dynamic this bowl season. Still, the Yellow Jackets have only done poorly in two games this year, and I think the loss to Georgia may have galvanized the rage of super-jerkish coach Paul Johnson.
Monday, January 4, 2010
Fiesta Bowl (P)Review
Well, back from Dallas. Bonus Cotton Bowl stuff is forthcoming, along with reviews of the myriad games I've missed reviewing. But for now, hours before it happens, the Fiesta Bowl (P)Review!
Tostitos Fiesta Bowl
Boise State vs. TCU
I figure that this matchup was determined at BCS headquarters. I imagine that BCS headquarters is a place wreathed in shadow and intrigue, located high atop a mountain next to Dracula's castle. Jimmy Hoffa's body is hidden in BCS headquarters. Oh, I've digressed. Let's move on down...
Look, the BCS is a joke. A joooooooooooooke. No one who likes college football to any degree would disagree with this statement. But the BCS isn't happy to be merely hated. No, they seek a greater degree of disgust. I'm talking abject loathing. Hatred that most people are incapable of feeling. To do that, they must not merely mess up the chances of 10 conference champions who don't get to play for a bowl, but also mess up the seasons of 3 teams who bought the "you must be undefeated to go to the championship" racket, only to get screwed in the end.
But, here in 2009, the BCS wasn't content with just doing that, either. No, they decided to give us all an extra good screwing by placing the two little teams safely away in Arizona, where they couldn't upset Iowa, Georgia Tech, Florida, Cincinnati, Oregon, Ohio State, Texas or Alabama. Heck, we all know that couldn't happen anyway...Oh, wait:
2008: Utah-31, Alabama-17
2006: Boise State-43, Oklahoma-42
2004: Utah-35, Pitt-7
The only non-automatic qualifying team to lose its BCS bowl? Hawaii, who was actually overrated. So, basically, we've had non-AQ teams in 4 BCS bowls prior to this, and they're 3-1. That's really good. But we're being played to swallow that "the season is the playoff." Bull crap. If the season were the playoff, then we'd give out 5 championship trophies to the 5 undefeated teams! Because in a real playoff, undefeated = championship. In college football, however, undefeated = stuffed into a corner where you can't hurt any of the big boy schools. Puh-leeze. The BCS has become nothing more than a schoolyard bully, and it needs to be gotten rid of. Immediately, if not sooner.
Should I watch this game? Yes, if only as a protest. The Boise State/Oklahoma game is one of the lowest rated BCS games ever. The reason? People didn't watch it because they figured that Oklahoma would kill Boise and because only one team (Oklahoma) had any pro prospects at all. The fact that the game turned into an all time classic is irrelevant, because people assumed that they would see the OU players in the pros and the Boise State players growing potatoes.
People treat college football like a training ground for the pros. I hate these people, because these are the people who think that because a guy went to Southern Cal he is more likely to be NFL-ready than someone with similar stats who went to Alcorn State. Will someone please call Ryan Leaf, Ki-Jana Carter, Akili Smith, or Matt Leinart and tell me how that philosophy's treating them right now?
These are also the people who have helped to kill the integrity of college sports. Will many TCU players play in the NFL? No. Same with Boise State. But we can appreciate them for what they are (What they are = student athletes) instead of considering them non-pro worthy and therefore not worth our time. Plus, TCU has an awesome defense that shut down 4 teams from automatic qualifying conferences. Now, none of those teams was very good, but that's still a little bit impressive.
CFR Pick: Gotta go with TCU. I know I've provided very little in the way of football analysis here, but I really think that the Horned Frog defense is something to contend with. TCU held Clemson's CJ Spiller of Clemson to 4.3 yards per carry and 112 yards of rushing on the day back in October. Spiller ripped off one big play, and if you remove that one outlier (yes, I'm cheating, I know, but stick with me here) then he carried for just 78 yards. I have trouble believing that Boise's offense can score that much, especially since Boise comes from a pretty weak conference. Top to bottom, the MWC (TCU's conference) could have stuck with the Big 10, Pac-10, Big East, Big 12, and ACC this season. The WAC (Boise's conference) could have stuck with none of them. The Mountain West is 4-0 in bowls, and only one of those games came against a non-AQ foe. The WAC is 1-2 with its lone win coming against Bowling Green. So, yeah, I'm picking TCU based on strength of schedule...
That's all for now. See you later on...
Tostitos Fiesta Bowl
Boise State vs. TCU
I figure that this matchup was determined at BCS headquarters. I imagine that BCS headquarters is a place wreathed in shadow and intrigue, located high atop a mountain next to Dracula's castle. Jimmy Hoffa's body is hidden in BCS headquarters. Oh, I've digressed. Let's move on down...
Look, the BCS is a joke. A joooooooooooooke. No one who likes college football to any degree would disagree with this statement. But the BCS isn't happy to be merely hated. No, they seek a greater degree of disgust. I'm talking abject loathing. Hatred that most people are incapable of feeling. To do that, they must not merely mess up the chances of 10 conference champions who don't get to play for a bowl, but also mess up the seasons of 3 teams who bought the "you must be undefeated to go to the championship" racket, only to get screwed in the end.
But, here in 2009, the BCS wasn't content with just doing that, either. No, they decided to give us all an extra good screwing by placing the two little teams safely away in Arizona, where they couldn't upset Iowa, Georgia Tech, Florida, Cincinnati, Oregon, Ohio State, Texas or Alabama. Heck, we all know that couldn't happen anyway...Oh, wait:
2008: Utah-31, Alabama-17
2006: Boise State-43, Oklahoma-42
2004: Utah-35, Pitt-7
The only non-automatic qualifying team to lose its BCS bowl? Hawaii, who was actually overrated. So, basically, we've had non-AQ teams in 4 BCS bowls prior to this, and they're 3-1. That's really good. But we're being played to swallow that "the season is the playoff." Bull crap. If the season were the playoff, then we'd give out 5 championship trophies to the 5 undefeated teams! Because in a real playoff, undefeated = championship. In college football, however, undefeated = stuffed into a corner where you can't hurt any of the big boy schools. Puh-leeze. The BCS has become nothing more than a schoolyard bully, and it needs to be gotten rid of. Immediately, if not sooner.
Should I watch this game? Yes, if only as a protest. The Boise State/Oklahoma game is one of the lowest rated BCS games ever. The reason? People didn't watch it because they figured that Oklahoma would kill Boise and because only one team (Oklahoma) had any pro prospects at all. The fact that the game turned into an all time classic is irrelevant, because people assumed that they would see the OU players in the pros and the Boise State players growing potatoes.
People treat college football like a training ground for the pros. I hate these people, because these are the people who think that because a guy went to Southern Cal he is more likely to be NFL-ready than someone with similar stats who went to Alcorn State. Will someone please call Ryan Leaf, Ki-Jana Carter, Akili Smith, or Matt Leinart and tell me how that philosophy's treating them right now?
These are also the people who have helped to kill the integrity of college sports. Will many TCU players play in the NFL? No. Same with Boise State. But we can appreciate them for what they are (What they are = student athletes) instead of considering them non-pro worthy and therefore not worth our time. Plus, TCU has an awesome defense that shut down 4 teams from automatic qualifying conferences. Now, none of those teams was very good, but that's still a little bit impressive.
CFR Pick: Gotta go with TCU. I know I've provided very little in the way of football analysis here, but I really think that the Horned Frog defense is something to contend with. TCU held Clemson's CJ Spiller of Clemson to 4.3 yards per carry and 112 yards of rushing on the day back in October. Spiller ripped off one big play, and if you remove that one outlier (yes, I'm cheating, I know, but stick with me here) then he carried for just 78 yards. I have trouble believing that Boise's offense can score that much, especially since Boise comes from a pretty weak conference. Top to bottom, the MWC (TCU's conference) could have stuck with the Big 10, Pac-10, Big East, Big 12, and ACC this season. The WAC (Boise's conference) could have stuck with none of them. The Mountain West is 4-0 in bowls, and only one of those games came against a non-AQ foe. The WAC is 1-2 with its lone win coming against Bowling Green. So, yeah, I'm picking TCU based on strength of schedule...
That's all for now. See you later on...
Friday, January 1, 2010
College Football review proudly presents...
A cheap cop-out. Er, I mean, the lightning quick overview of the New Year's Day and January 2nd bowl games! Because of a long drive, I can't do in-depth anything for these 10 games. I promise to make it up to you with good reviews and a decent preview set for the last couple games. Thus, without further ado...here are the games (picks in school color and in bold) and a list of games you should watch (particularly compelling reasons given in parenthesis:
January 1, 2010:
Outback Bowl: Northwestern vs. Auburn
Capital One Bowl: #13 Penn State vs. #12 LSU
Gator Bowl: #16 West Virginia vs. Florida State (side note for this one, pour out a glass of your favorite beverage for Bobby Bowden. The man's earned that much from all of us who love college football.)
Rose Bowl: #7 Oregon vs. #8 Ohio State
Sugar Bowl: #3 Cincinnati vs. #5 Florida
January 2, 2010:
International Bowl: South Florida vs. Northern Illinois
Cotton Bowl: #19 Oklahoma State vs. Ole Miss
Papajohns.com Bowl: South Carolina vs. UConn
Liberty Bowl: Arkansas vs. East Carolina
Alamo Bowl: Michigan State vs. Texas Tech
Games you should watch:
That's all for that. Happy New Year, and I'll see you guys with a full writeup of the week and a half I've missed...
January 1, 2010:
Outback Bowl: Northwestern vs. Auburn
Capital One Bowl: #13 Penn State vs. #12 LSU
Gator Bowl: #16 West Virginia vs. Florida State (side note for this one, pour out a glass of your favorite beverage for Bobby Bowden. The man's earned that much from all of us who love college football.)
Rose Bowl: #7 Oregon vs. #8 Ohio State
Sugar Bowl: #3 Cincinnati vs. #5 Florida
January 2, 2010:
International Bowl: South Florida vs. Northern Illinois
Cotton Bowl: #19 Oklahoma State vs. Ole Miss
Papajohns.com Bowl: South Carolina vs. UConn
Liberty Bowl: Arkansas vs. East Carolina
Alamo Bowl: Michigan State vs. Texas Tech
Games you should watch:
- Capital One Bowl
- Gator Bowl (last game of the second winningest coach of all time. Watch this game, if only for historical value)
- Rose Bowl
- Sugar Bowl (Tebow's last game, forget Urban Meyer.)
- International Bowl (to say that you watched it. You'll be in the minority.)
- Cotton Bowl (you might just see me on TV. Isn't that worth it?)
- Alamo Bowl (see how Texas Tech performs without its coach...
That's all for that. Happy New Year, and I'll see you guys with a full writeup of the week and a half I've missed...
Monday, December 28, 2009
Bowl (P)Review: December 31
December 31st. The final day of the old year, one which was somewhat disappointing for those of us who are utter fanatics of college football.
Sure, there were some compelling storylines (5 undefeated teams, Iowa making a deep run despite nearly losing to just about everyone, Bobby Bowden's impending firing, Southern Cal being bad, etc.) and some compelling single events (a thriller in Blacksburg, Legarette Blount sucker punching a guy on the first night of the season, Stanford running up the score on Southern Cal, etc.) but 2009 lacked the general weirdness of 2007 and 2008. Still, 'twas a good season overall, and the year wasn't that bad, either. So as the decade ends, we shall evaluate the last college football to be played this calendar year, starting wiiiiiiith...
Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl
Houston vs. Air Force
Anyone else find it odd that Bell Helicopter sponsors a bowl? Yes, I understand Bell has made many types of helicopters for the US military for many, many years. But still, don't you want your bowl to be sponsored by something that people can buy realistically? Take the Chick-Fil-A Bowl. You watch it, you get hungry, you remember the bowl name, you buy some Chick-Fil-A. I'm not sure that this theory works with helicopters:
Wife: Honey! We need to go to Aunt Martha's in Wisconsin!
Husband [quietly, to himself]: Hmmm, that's quite a drive. [looks at television, showing this bowl game, sees bowl sponsor] I've got it! We shall purchase a helicopter and fly to Aunt Martha's!
Wife: Sweetie, we can buy plane tickets for roughly one thousand times less than the cost of a helicopter.
Husband: [shouted, at top of lungs] CURSE YOU BOWL GAME!!!!!
[end scene]
(PS, to the American Theatre Wing: You can send me my Tony in the mail.)
Your football analysis can be found below...
Should I watch this game? Well, do you like conflicting styles? Then yes. Houston's got one of the best offenses in the country, and they averaged 43.9 points per game. Air Force, meanwhile, allows only 15.3 points per game, and has the best pass defense in the country, something that should worry pass-wacky Houston. This is going to be a ridiculously close game to call, and as bad as I've been on my picks, you should take this one as a complete shot in the dark. I have no idea who will win this game.
CFR Pick: I've belittled Houston all year, and I will continue to do so. I'm picking Air Force, since I think defense trumps offense more than the other way around.
Brut Sun Bowl
Oklahoma vs #21 Stanford
Well, Oklahoma's season pretty much defines "disappointing" doesn't it? Starting out in the top 5, coming off a season where you played in the national title game, you expect better than a Sun Bowl berth at the end of the year. Losing your superstar tight end and quarterback surely didn't help the Sooners, but I'm not sure that they would have done that much better with Bradford. Maybe 2 more wins, but lest we forget, Oklahoma was only up 10-7 on BYU when Bradford got hurt the first time. Even with a healthy Sam Bradford, Oklahoma might have only made it to the Cotton Bowl.
Stanford, on the other hand, had a surprisingly good year with a surprisingly good running back. Toby Gerhart. Gerhart played his way into the Heisman conversation, and he ran over some of the Pac-10's better teams. Stanford, however, has trouble with non-Pac-10 foes this year, beating mediocre Notre Dame by only 7 and losing to a Wake Forest team that ended up going 5-7. With the Pac-10 1-2 in bowls right now (by the way, thanks Cal and Oregon State...), Stanford has to show that they can beat the best non-conference foe that they've faced all year. This game will really give us a good picture of the Pac-10's strength or weakness.
Should I watch this game? Yes, actually. Game should be a good one, and it will be interesting to see if Oklahoma's defense (which has been spotty at times, yet good at others) can keep Gerhart from gaining 200 yards. I, for one, think they can.
CFR Pick: Another toss up in a day of good games. I'm taking Oklahoma in this one, assuming that they all make it onto the field without separating shoulders and tearing ACLs. The Pac-10 may have "something to prove" but I doubt this is the game in which they'll prove it.
Texas Bowl
Navy vs. Missouri
Wait, the state of Texas sponsors a bowl? That's impressive. I look forward to seeing if Navy's triple option offense can run the ball against Missouri. It'll be a sight to see, I'm sure. Missouri's run defense is 12th in the nation, but they play in the normally pass wacky Big 12. It will be interesting to see how they perform against a Navy rush offense that is 4th in the country. Navy played inferior competition most of the year, but their only loss to a non-bowl team is a defeat at the hands of pathetic Hawaii. Missouri, meanwhile comes in riding a 3 game win streak. It should be 5, but they lost to Baylor somehow.
Should I watch this game? Yes, especially since this day and the two that follow it are all about watching teams you normally don't get to. Plus, this game should be pretty good, what with the defensive/offensive matchup. Plus, the option is always fun to watch, even if you fail at it.
CFR Pick: I'll take Missouri, but that might be more of a guess...
Insight Bowl
Iowa State vs. Minnesota
Two of the barely bowl worthy teams from two pretty bad conferences (Texas notwithstanding) (Oh, while we're on that subject, how'd Iowa State end up in the Big 12?). Honestly, I'm not sure how Minnesota finished bowl eligible. They finished below non-bowl eligible Purdue in conference. That's insane! It really blows my tiny little mind.
To be fair, the game's on the NFL network, meaning that if you could watch it, you also have a lot of TV channels. And something, anything, else must be on. Heck, I'm not even sure why the NFL would agree to take this garbage. I guess it's because either of these teams could beat the Rams.
Should I watch this game? Two 6-6 teams battling it out in a bowl that means almost nothing. I'd rather watch Army play Notre Dame in the 10,000 Flushes Toilet Bowl. I can't watch this one, since I don't have NFL Network. Even if I could watch the game, I highly doubt that I would.
CFR Pick: Eeeeeh...I don't know. Tough call, really. Minnesota's 0-2 overall in this game. Iowa State's 1-0. I'll take the Cyclones, with no degree of confidence at all.
Chick-Fil-A Bowl
Virginia Tech vs Tennessee
The matchup of the night. Indeed, the matchup I've been eagerly waiting for ever since the announcement. As avid readers know, I went to two college football games this year: one in Blacksburg, VA and one in Knoxville, TN. This game should be a good one, featuring two defenses that are pretty good and two bad offenses. How bad? Well, Virginia Tech's put up some impressive point totals this year, but those point totals normally came against bad teams. 7 of their 24 points against Alabama came on a kick return, they only scored 16 against ECU and Nebraska, and they managed just 17 points at home against Carolina in their loss to the sticky feet back in October. Yes, Tech comes in riding a win streak, but note that the 42-13 final against UVa is belied by the fact that Tech was up 14-13 at the half. Plus, here's a weird statistic for you:
Virginia Tech's record in the city of Atlanta in 2009: 0-2
Virginia Tech's record any place on earth other than Atlanta in 2009: 9-1
Maybe all that time in Blacksburg made the Tech players wary of flashing lights and car horns and indoor plumbing...
Tennessee, meanwhile, keeps getting positive press. I've heard at least 2 ESPN announcers say that they're playing "really good football" right now. Really? Tennessee's won 4 of its last 5 games. If you do absolutely no research whatsoever, that looks good. Then you look at the games: crushed South Carolina (legit), beat Memphis (cupcake, doesn't count), got killed by Ole Miss (self-explanatory), beat Vandy (conference cupcake, doesn't count), beat Kentucky in overtime (Kentucky went to a bowl, so we'll call this one legit). Look, I agree that the Vols are not pushovers and should not be thought of as such. But to call wins over 2 bowl teams, 2 awful teams, and a loss to the underachievers at Mississippi "really good football" is a bit of an overstatement, dontcha think?
Should I watch this game? Yes, because it will be a good one. Lots of defense, lots of run plays. Game should be over in plenty of time for New Year's Rockin' Eve. Really, who doesn't love Dick Clark? Oh, and my favorite team's playing. I might be a wee bit biased.
CFR Pick: As bad as I'm doing at picking games, plus considering the awfulness that is the ACC, I shudder to do this. But I'm picking Virginia Tech. I won't ever pick against 'em. You all already knew that, so it does boggle the mind a bit as to why you're reading this. Let's end this post...
So that's all for the 5 games on the 31st. Stay tuned (or see above if you're reading this one later) for a review of bowl week 2 and the preview of the New Year's Day games.
Sure, there were some compelling storylines (5 undefeated teams, Iowa making a deep run despite nearly losing to just about everyone, Bobby Bowden's impending firing, Southern Cal being bad, etc.) and some compelling single events (a thriller in Blacksburg, Legarette Blount sucker punching a guy on the first night of the season, Stanford running up the score on Southern Cal, etc.) but 2009 lacked the general weirdness of 2007 and 2008. Still, 'twas a good season overall, and the year wasn't that bad, either. So as the decade ends, we shall evaluate the last college football to be played this calendar year, starting wiiiiiiith...
Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl
Houston vs. Air Force
Anyone else find it odd that Bell Helicopter sponsors a bowl? Yes, I understand Bell has made many types of helicopters for the US military for many, many years. But still, don't you want your bowl to be sponsored by something that people can buy realistically? Take the Chick-Fil-A Bowl. You watch it, you get hungry, you remember the bowl name, you buy some Chick-Fil-A. I'm not sure that this theory works with helicopters:
Wife: Honey! We need to go to Aunt Martha's in Wisconsin!
Husband [quietly, to himself]: Hmmm, that's quite a drive. [looks at television, showing this bowl game, sees bowl sponsor] I've got it! We shall purchase a helicopter and fly to Aunt Martha's!
Wife: Sweetie, we can buy plane tickets for roughly one thousand times less than the cost of a helicopter.
Husband: [shouted, at top of lungs] CURSE YOU BOWL GAME!!!!!
[end scene]
(PS, to the American Theatre Wing: You can send me my Tony in the mail.)
Your football analysis can be found below...
Should I watch this game? Well, do you like conflicting styles? Then yes. Houston's got one of the best offenses in the country, and they averaged 43.9 points per game. Air Force, meanwhile, allows only 15.3 points per game, and has the best pass defense in the country, something that should worry pass-wacky Houston. This is going to be a ridiculously close game to call, and as bad as I've been on my picks, you should take this one as a complete shot in the dark. I have no idea who will win this game.
CFR Pick: I've belittled Houston all year, and I will continue to do so. I'm picking Air Force, since I think defense trumps offense more than the other way around.
Brut Sun Bowl
Oklahoma vs #21 Stanford
Well, Oklahoma's season pretty much defines "disappointing" doesn't it? Starting out in the top 5, coming off a season where you played in the national title game, you expect better than a Sun Bowl berth at the end of the year. Losing your superstar tight end and quarterback surely didn't help the Sooners, but I'm not sure that they would have done that much better with Bradford. Maybe 2 more wins, but lest we forget, Oklahoma was only up 10-7 on BYU when Bradford got hurt the first time. Even with a healthy Sam Bradford, Oklahoma might have only made it to the Cotton Bowl.
Stanford, on the other hand, had a surprisingly good year with a surprisingly good running back. Toby Gerhart. Gerhart played his way into the Heisman conversation, and he ran over some of the Pac-10's better teams. Stanford, however, has trouble with non-Pac-10 foes this year, beating mediocre Notre Dame by only 7 and losing to a Wake Forest team that ended up going 5-7. With the Pac-10 1-2 in bowls right now (by the way, thanks Cal and Oregon State...), Stanford has to show that they can beat the best non-conference foe that they've faced all year. This game will really give us a good picture of the Pac-10's strength or weakness.
Should I watch this game? Yes, actually. Game should be a good one, and it will be interesting to see if Oklahoma's defense (which has been spotty at times, yet good at others) can keep Gerhart from gaining 200 yards. I, for one, think they can.
CFR Pick: Another toss up in a day of good games. I'm taking Oklahoma in this one, assuming that they all make it onto the field without separating shoulders and tearing ACLs. The Pac-10 may have "something to prove" but I doubt this is the game in which they'll prove it.
Texas Bowl
Navy vs. Missouri
Wait, the state of Texas sponsors a bowl? That's impressive. I look forward to seeing if Navy's triple option offense can run the ball against Missouri. It'll be a sight to see, I'm sure. Missouri's run defense is 12th in the nation, but they play in the normally pass wacky Big 12. It will be interesting to see how they perform against a Navy rush offense that is 4th in the country. Navy played inferior competition most of the year, but their only loss to a non-bowl team is a defeat at the hands of pathetic Hawaii. Missouri, meanwhile comes in riding a 3 game win streak. It should be 5, but they lost to Baylor somehow.
Should I watch this game? Yes, especially since this day and the two that follow it are all about watching teams you normally don't get to. Plus, this game should be pretty good, what with the defensive/offensive matchup. Plus, the option is always fun to watch, even if you fail at it.
CFR Pick: I'll take Missouri, but that might be more of a guess...
Insight Bowl
Iowa State vs. Minnesota
Two of the barely bowl worthy teams from two pretty bad conferences (Texas notwithstanding) (Oh, while we're on that subject, how'd Iowa State end up in the Big 12?). Honestly, I'm not sure how Minnesota finished bowl eligible. They finished below non-bowl eligible Purdue in conference. That's insane! It really blows my tiny little mind.
To be fair, the game's on the NFL network, meaning that if you could watch it, you also have a lot of TV channels. And something, anything, else must be on. Heck, I'm not even sure why the NFL would agree to take this garbage. I guess it's because either of these teams could beat the Rams.
Should I watch this game? Two 6-6 teams battling it out in a bowl that means almost nothing. I'd rather watch Army play Notre Dame in the 10,000 Flushes Toilet Bowl. I can't watch this one, since I don't have NFL Network. Even if I could watch the game, I highly doubt that I would.
CFR Pick: Eeeeeh...I don't know. Tough call, really. Minnesota's 0-2 overall in this game. Iowa State's 1-0. I'll take the Cyclones, with no degree of confidence at all.
Chick-Fil-A Bowl
Virginia Tech vs Tennessee
The matchup of the night. Indeed, the matchup I've been eagerly waiting for ever since the announcement. As avid readers know, I went to two college football games this year: one in Blacksburg, VA and one in Knoxville, TN. This game should be a good one, featuring two defenses that are pretty good and two bad offenses. How bad? Well, Virginia Tech's put up some impressive point totals this year, but those point totals normally came against bad teams. 7 of their 24 points against Alabama came on a kick return, they only scored 16 against ECU and Nebraska, and they managed just 17 points at home against Carolina in their loss to the sticky feet back in October. Yes, Tech comes in riding a win streak, but note that the 42-13 final against UVa is belied by the fact that Tech was up 14-13 at the half. Plus, here's a weird statistic for you:
Virginia Tech's record in the city of Atlanta in 2009: 0-2
Virginia Tech's record any place on earth other than Atlanta in 2009: 9-1
Maybe all that time in Blacksburg made the Tech players wary of flashing lights and car horns and indoor plumbing...
Tennessee, meanwhile, keeps getting positive press. I've heard at least 2 ESPN announcers say that they're playing "really good football" right now. Really? Tennessee's won 4 of its last 5 games. If you do absolutely no research whatsoever, that looks good. Then you look at the games: crushed South Carolina (legit), beat Memphis (cupcake, doesn't count), got killed by Ole Miss (self-explanatory), beat Vandy (conference cupcake, doesn't count), beat Kentucky in overtime (Kentucky went to a bowl, so we'll call this one legit). Look, I agree that the Vols are not pushovers and should not be thought of as such. But to call wins over 2 bowl teams, 2 awful teams, and a loss to the underachievers at Mississippi "really good football" is a bit of an overstatement, dontcha think?
Should I watch this game? Yes, because it will be a good one. Lots of defense, lots of run plays. Game should be over in plenty of time for New Year's Rockin' Eve. Really, who doesn't love Dick Clark? Oh, and my favorite team's playing. I might be a wee bit biased.
CFR Pick: As bad as I'm doing at picking games, plus considering the awfulness that is the ACC, I shudder to do this. But I'm picking Virginia Tech. I won't ever pick against 'em. You all already knew that, so it does boggle the mind a bit as to why you're reading this. Let's end this post...
So that's all for the 5 games on the 31st. Stay tuned (or see above if you're reading this one later) for a review of bowl week 2 and the preview of the New Year's Day games.
Friday, December 25, 2009
Bowl (P)review: Week 2
After that disastrous first week, we're going to go to December 30. The 31st, 1st, and 2nd will be the subject of their own previews, as they are simply too massive to wrangle all at once. Hopefully my picks are better for this one. They can't be much worse, eh? Moving along, allow me to offend. First up...Clemson fans!
Gaylord Hotels Music City Bowl
Clemson vs. Kentucky
What's it say about Clemson's division of the ACC that they lost the ACC Championship Game and slid to the 5th best bowl the ACC has to offer? While we're on the subject, what's it say about the conference as a whole that Clemson nearly won the ACC title game? Either way, this will be a matchup between two teams that frankly aren't that good. They're major conference teams that are both glad to be in bowls, but neither team is jaw-droppingly good. Other than CJ Spiller, who is an amazing kick returner, and an alright running back. Yes, he's just "alright" as a running back. And before you point me to his awesome stats in the ACC Championship Game, please take a gander at his 18 yard game against
Now that I've really offended the Spiller-worshiping Clemson fans (SIDE NOTE: Come burn me in effigy on the quad!
Should I watch this game? Watch the kickoffs and punts to see Spiller do well. You can nap through the rest.
CFR Pick: Clemson by at least 14.
Advocare V100
Texas A&M vs. Georgia
Texas A&M really only did one semi-important thing this year. That semi-important thing? They stuck with
Should I watch this game? Yeah, probably. Take the edge off that first day back from Christmas vacation, plus you'll get to see some decent football.
CFR Pick: Never pick a Big 12 team over an SEC team if you can help it. I can help it. Ergo, UGA wins this one.
EagleBank Bowl
UCLA vs.
Should I watch this game? Well,
CFR Pick: UCLA will win, but
Champs Sports Bowl
#15 Miami vs #25 Wisconsin
Miami's an alright football team, one of the better in the sea of mediocrity that is the Atlantic Coast Conference.
Should I watch this game? Yes, as this one and the Orange Bowl will help answer one of this season's biggest questions: Who's worse? The ACC or the Big 10? Should the game end in overtime, I believe we can all settle on a tie.
CFR Pick:
Roady's Humanitarian Bowl
#20
I got one right! I mean, Bowl Review: Day 4
Ah, sarcasm saves me again...thanks, SMU! Shall we overview? I believe we shall.
Hawaii Bowl
Southern Methodist-45, Nevada-10
I'm going to skip the surreptitious analysis of the game. I mean, really. It was 45-10. What's there to analyze? Instead, allow me to ask this: What does this mean for the WAC? I mean, the BCS gave us a royal screwing by having TCU and Boise play each other instead of actually going out and embarrassing a major program again. So we really don't know how good the WAC is. But we do know that Nevada had an awesome conference run and defeated all but Boise State in conference play. Plus, they gave the Broncos an excellent run for their money before going down late in the game.
When one considers that the WAC is 0-2 in their bowls thus far with Nevada getting crushed and Fresno getting upset by upstart Wyoming, the conference is in dire need of a win. Since TCU could beat Boise by 30 this season, Idaho is now the WAC's best hope to win a bowl when they play Bowling Green on the 30th.
I am merely happy to have gotten a pick right. Yeah, I don't suck too bad!
CFR Picks: 1-5
Meanwhile, and I don't know why I didn't address this last time, the Pac-10 is 0-2 in bowls. Now, Pac-10 apologists will point to all sort of various things that have happened this year, as well as the conference's bowl record in previous years. I know this because I tried to rationalize with Pac-10 fans on the ESPN forums after the Oregon State/BYU game. It is a mistake that I will not repeat.
The point is simple: The season that's going on right now, the Pac-10 is 0 for 2. End of story. You want to stop the articles and complaints? Win a game and quit making excuses. There, I said it. I feel better.
Hawaii Bowl
Southern Methodist-45, Nevada-10
I'm going to skip the surreptitious analysis of the game. I mean, really. It was 45-10. What's there to analyze? Instead, allow me to ask this: What does this mean for the WAC? I mean, the BCS gave us a royal screwing by having TCU and Boise play each other instead of actually going out and embarrassing a major program again. So we really don't know how good the WAC is. But we do know that Nevada had an awesome conference run and defeated all but Boise State in conference play. Plus, they gave the Broncos an excellent run for their money before going down late in the game.
When one considers that the WAC is 0-2 in their bowls thus far with Nevada getting crushed and Fresno getting upset by upstart Wyoming, the conference is in dire need of a win. Since TCU could beat Boise by 30 this season, Idaho is now the WAC's best hope to win a bowl when they play Bowling Green on the 30th.
I am merely happy to have gotten a pick right. Yeah, I don't suck too bad!
CFR Picks: 1-5
Meanwhile, and I don't know why I didn't address this last time, the Pac-10 is 0-2 in bowls. Now, Pac-10 apologists will point to all sort of various things that have happened this year, as well as the conference's bowl record in previous years. I know this because I tried to rationalize with Pac-10 fans on the ESPN forums after the Oregon State/BYU game. It is a mistake that I will not repeat.
The point is simple: The season that's going on right now, the Pac-10 is 0 for 2. End of story. You want to stop the articles and complaints? Win a game and quit making excuses. There, I said it. I feel better.
Wednesday, December 23, 2009
Bowl Review: Day 3
The odds of me going 0-34 are one in 582076609134674077265625. Mind you, the odds of me going 0 for 5 were one in 3125. So maybe I'm special. (PS: Given odds are assuming there's a 50/50 chance that either team wins the game...) Heck, I can't get much worse at this, right? Let's run briefly over the games.
Maaco Bowl Las Vegas
#18 Oregon State-20, #14 BYU-44
Well the irony of this one is that I nearly picked BYU. "Nearly" mind you doesn't count as "did" and so I can't cling feebly to that.
The Mountain West still has the Pac-10's number, and they spent most of the night calling the Pac-10. Prank calls. Unforgivable things, and the like.
The story of this game, at least to the casual eye of an observer, was the wind. The wind, which caused 2 Oregon State punts to net 6 yards, once by pushing the ball backwards in mid-air, and then by pushing the ball into the stands. Honestly, this game was a little closer than the score would indicate, but I suppose that the difference between 24 points and 17 points matters little in the grand scheme of things. Let's move on.
CFR Picks: 0-4
San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl
#23 Utah-37, California-27
You know, my picks have gotten so horrible that my dad, one of the 2-5 readers this thing has, requested that I change my pick in the Pitt/UNC game. That's how horrible my picks have been. Like, if you bet money based on my picks, you have probably been shot in one or both kneecaps by now. I'm not sure I want to pick Virginia Tech to win their bowl in next week's preview. That is how bad this has gotten.
This game again showed a Pac-10 team being beaten by a Mountain West club. What's worse for that hated conference on the left coast is this: From empirical evidence available this season and last, the best conference on the West Coast is a non-automatic qualifying conference.
Utah continues to win bowl games, and Cal breaks their streak of wins as an unranked club. Right when I pick them to win. Never again, Pac-10. Never again. (PS: Southern Cal, I have never ever liked you, but please win on the 26th so I can feel like I suck less.)
CFR Picks: 0-5
I'm going to turn this into a blog about knitting or something. I can't ever be this wrong about knitting, right? Until next time...awayyyyy we go!
Maaco Bowl Las Vegas
#18 Oregon State-20, #14 BYU-44
Well the irony of this one is that I nearly picked BYU. "Nearly" mind you doesn't count as "did" and so I can't cling feebly to that.
The Mountain West still has the Pac-10's number, and they spent most of the night calling the Pac-10. Prank calls. Unforgivable things, and the like.
The story of this game, at least to the casual eye of an observer, was the wind. The wind, which caused 2 Oregon State punts to net 6 yards, once by pushing the ball backwards in mid-air, and then by pushing the ball into the stands. Honestly, this game was a little closer than the score would indicate, but I suppose that the difference between 24 points and 17 points matters little in the grand scheme of things. Let's move on.
CFR Picks: 0-4
San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl
#23 Utah-37, California-27
You know, my picks have gotten so horrible that my dad, one of the 2-5 readers this thing has, requested that I change my pick in the Pitt/UNC game. That's how horrible my picks have been. Like, if you bet money based on my picks, you have probably been shot in one or both kneecaps by now. I'm not sure I want to pick Virginia Tech to win their bowl in next week's preview. That is how bad this has gotten.
This game again showed a Pac-10 team being beaten by a Mountain West club. What's worse for that hated conference on the left coast is this: From empirical evidence available this season and last, the best conference on the West Coast is a non-automatic qualifying conference.
Utah continues to win bowl games, and Cal breaks their streak of wins as an unranked club. Right when I pick them to win. Never again, Pac-10. Never again. (PS: Southern Cal, I have never ever liked you, but please win on the 26th so I can feel like I suck less.)
CFR Picks: 0-5
I'm going to turn this into a blog about knitting or something. I can't ever be this wrong about knitting, right? Until next time...awayyyyy we go!
Monday, December 21, 2009
Bowl Review: Day 2
R + L Carriers New Orleans Bowl
Southern Miss-32, Middle Tennessee-42
Well, crap. Hopefully I'll do better at bowl picking than my current 0-3. On the bright side, this one featured Southern Miss in their away jerseys, meaning that we didn't get blinded by the canary yellow.
Honestly, this game wasn't as close as the score indicates, Southern Miss's last touchdown was utterly meaningless, scored to close the gap from 16 points down to a more manageable 10 with only 27 seconds left. Middle Tennessee's quarterback, Dwight Dasher ran for 200 yards AND threw for 162. Hard to lose when your quarterback puts up those kind of numbers. That's all I got...
CFR Pick count: 0-3
Southern Miss-32, Middle Tennessee-42
Well, crap. Hopefully I'll do better at bowl picking than my current 0-3. On the bright side, this one featured Southern Miss in their away jerseys, meaning that we didn't get blinded by the canary yellow.
Honestly, this game wasn't as close as the score indicates, Southern Miss's last touchdown was utterly meaningless, scored to close the gap from 16 points down to a more manageable 10 with only 27 seconds left. Middle Tennessee's quarterback, Dwight Dasher ran for 200 yards AND threw for 162. Hard to lose when your quarterback puts up those kind of numbers. That's all I got...
CFR Pick count: 0-3
Sunday, December 20, 2009
Bowl Review: Day 1
Oops.
Oh, you don't know why I typed that? The short version is because there were 2 bowls today and I missed on both of my predictions. I'll repay you with a timely post:
New Mexico Bowl
Fresno State-28, Wyoming-35 (2OT)
You know, if you ignore the fact that these were two mediocre teams, this was actually a very good game. Good hard hits, a thrilling comeback in regulation, and some good overtime play. My thoughts?
Well, in the first overtime, Fresno State successfully got the ball down onto the one yard line of Wyoming and managed to do nothing in 4 tries...That's actually a credit to Wyoming's defense, as it is just about impossible to stop 4 straight runs up the middle. Fresno State did nothing wrong, and I hope that this episode doesn't encourage more coaches to try play action or sweep plays from the 1 yard line. Since it occurred in a fairly obscure bowl between two fairly obscure teams, I'm sure that won't be the case.
Any hoo, in the next overtime, Wyoming played it safe and went for the field goal. In footage that you can no doubt catch on youtube or ESPN, the kicker missed, but Wyoming players and fans were already headed onto the field. Look, guys, the football's in the air for, like, 3 seconds. Can't you wait for the referee to signal? Is that so hard? Premature celebrations bug the heck out of me, especially in light of the fact that, had Fresno won the game, the sting would have been made much more bitter. Kinda like what happened to Kentucky in this nifty link. So fans, I beseech you, wait for the refs' signal. It's not too hard, it doesn't take too long, and it keeps you from looking like an idiot...
Finally, for this game at least, take note that Fresno tried the ol' "offensive lineman gets the ball" trick again in the second overtime. If you'll recall, this happened during the last week of the regular season (second, equally nifty, link) during the final play against Illinois. This time it was intentional. Ironically, this time it didn't work. I'm not sure what that should tell us, but I'm sure it tells us something.
Congrats to Wyoming on winning their first bowl since 2004, and only their second since 1966. Also, congrats on starting bowl season off right!
CFR Pick counter: 0-1
St. Petersburg Bowl presented by Beef 'O' Brady's
Rutgers-45, UCF-24
See the post below this one? Where it says UCF will upset Rutgers? Yeah, whoever wrote that is an idiot.
Oh, you're still here? Well, I can analyze this one pretty simply: Once I found out exactly what Beef 'O' Brady's was, my interest in this game plummeted. I figured after the high scoring first half that we'd be in for something of a shootout. Unfortunately for those of us who thought UCF might win, they left their offense in the locker room for the 3rd quarter, and an 11 point halftime lead became an insurmountable 21 point 4th quarter lead. The onside kick attempt that was run back for a touchdown probably didn't help...
Congrats to Rutgers, you beat a team from an inferior conference. Since you play in the Big East and played one of the worst nonconference schedules imaginable (Howard, Florida International, Maryland and Texas Southern), that's basically what you've done all year. Nice job.
CFR Picks: 0-2
Tune in tomorrow to see if I'm really as bad at this as it seems!
Oh, you don't know why I typed that? The short version is because there were 2 bowls today and I missed on both of my predictions. I'll repay you with a timely post:
New Mexico Bowl
Fresno State-28, Wyoming-35 (2OT)
You know, if you ignore the fact that these were two mediocre teams, this was actually a very good game. Good hard hits, a thrilling comeback in regulation, and some good overtime play. My thoughts?
Well, in the first overtime, Fresno State successfully got the ball down onto the one yard line of Wyoming and managed to do nothing in 4 tries...That's actually a credit to Wyoming's defense, as it is just about impossible to stop 4 straight runs up the middle. Fresno State did nothing wrong, and I hope that this episode doesn't encourage more coaches to try play action or sweep plays from the 1 yard line. Since it occurred in a fairly obscure bowl between two fairly obscure teams, I'm sure that won't be the case.
Any hoo, in the next overtime, Wyoming played it safe and went for the field goal. In footage that you can no doubt catch on youtube or ESPN, the kicker missed, but Wyoming players and fans were already headed onto the field. Look, guys, the football's in the air for, like, 3 seconds. Can't you wait for the referee to signal? Is that so hard? Premature celebrations bug the heck out of me, especially in light of the fact that, had Fresno won the game, the sting would have been made much more bitter. Kinda like what happened to Kentucky in this nifty link. So fans, I beseech you, wait for the refs' signal. It's not too hard, it doesn't take too long, and it keeps you from looking like an idiot...
Finally, for this game at least, take note that Fresno tried the ol' "offensive lineman gets the ball" trick again in the second overtime. If you'll recall, this happened during the last week of the regular season (second, equally nifty, link) during the final play against Illinois. This time it was intentional. Ironically, this time it didn't work. I'm not sure what that should tell us, but I'm sure it tells us something.
Congrats to Wyoming on winning their first bowl since 2004, and only their second since 1966. Also, congrats on starting bowl season off right!
CFR Pick counter: 0-1
St. Petersburg Bowl presented by Beef 'O' Brady's
Rutgers-45, UCF-24
See the post below this one? Where it says UCF will upset Rutgers? Yeah, whoever wrote that is an idiot.
Oh, you're still here? Well, I can analyze this one pretty simply: Once I found out exactly what Beef 'O' Brady's was, my interest in this game plummeted. I figured after the high scoring first half that we'd be in for something of a shootout. Unfortunately for those of us who thought UCF might win, they left their offense in the locker room for the 3rd quarter, and an 11 point halftime lead became an insurmountable 21 point 4th quarter lead. The onside kick attempt that was run back for a touchdown probably didn't help...
Congrats to Rutgers, you beat a team from an inferior conference. Since you play in the Big East and played one of the worst nonconference schedules imaginable (Howard, Florida International, Maryland and Texas Southern), that's basically what you've done all year. Nice job.
CFR Picks: 0-2
Tune in tomorrow to see if I'm really as bad at this as it seems!
Friday, December 11, 2009
Bowl (P)Review: Week One
So bowl season is juuuuust about here. I know you're thinking: why do I care? And the answer for the first week is: "I don't know." The first 7 days of bowl season are rather underwhelming, but writing up a review of all 34 at once with my over-long writing style would create a document longer than the US Constitution. And just as important, I might add! (Satirical side note: The US Government ignores both my blog and the Constitution) For bowl season, there will be a weekly preview and day-by-day reviews. (Well, that's the plan...we all know how great I am at updating this thing.)
Moving along, our order will be chronological, and I'll even tell you if you who I think will win, and if you should even bother to watch the bowl in question. This week's more of an appetizer than a main course. Which is regrettable, as this appetizer is like getting a chicken wing and a plate full of goo. I will leave you to determine which of the following games is the "chicken wing" in the above metaphor. We go!
December 19, 2009
New Mexico Bowl
Fresno State vs. Wyoming
Well, the first bowl of the year takes place in an obscure state between two obscure teams that roughly 7 people care about. Fresno played a challenging schedule against several good teams. Wyoming, meanwhile, played Texas close for 1 quarter, then faded to 5th in its conference, getting a bowl berth by beating similarly mediocre Colorado State in its final game. The outcome doesn't look too brilliant for the Cowboys, though they are in their first bowl since 2004. So there's something to cling to.
Should I watch this bowl? Well, if you have nothing to do on Saturday at 4:30, sure. If you have something better to do (examples: brush your teeth for 3 hours, repaint your ceiling, take a nap) then I'd say do that.
CFR pick: Fresno State should win this one. That's all I got...
St. Petersburg Bowl presented by Beef 'O' Brady's
UCF vs. Rutgers
You know, I get the feeling that bowl season would be better if the good bowls were spaced out a bit, to build the excitement. Central Florida and Rutgers play in this game which should have better quality football than Wyoming/Fresno, but is that really saying all that much? Rutgers had a pretty disappointing year, especially when one considers their 8 wins ring hollow due to their awful conference and their fairly bad non-conference schedule. The Scarlet Knights only played one major conference opponent outside of the Big East, and that opponent was Maryland; the worst team in the pretty darn bad ACC. UCF, meanwhile, played multiple good teams and lost to most of them. They did, however, beat a ranked Houston team, which is more impressive than the ranked team Rutgers beat: South Florida.
Should I watch this? Honestly? I'm going to watch this game just to hear how many times they say the sponsor's name. "Beef 'O' Brady's" is just fun to say. Do I have any idea what the heck it is? No. Which is another reason to watch! Oh, you want a valid football reason to watch this game? There are none unless you're a Rutgers or UCF fan. Condolences if you are, by the way.
CFR pick: I'm picking Central Florida for the upset. I am going to watch this game only because I love you, dear readers, and I am willing to punish myself for your entertainment.
December 20, 2009
R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl
Southern Mississippi vs. Middle Tennessee State
I love bowl season. As I understand it, it's a feast of football. Unfortunately, these first three games serve as atrocious appetizers. It'd be like going to a swanky restaurant and having someone offer you fish heads as your appetizer. Sure, you'll be getting filet mignon after a bit, but the fish heads are hard to swallow. This particular bowl, for example, features two middling teams from two middling conferences. At least the diversity in play style will be nice: MTSU is a defensive team, while Southern Miss is offensively minded. Unfortunately, to watch this game one must look directly at Southern Miss's bright yellow unis, which can cause blindness, as shown below:
Sorry, folks. I had to warn you, though...
Should I watch this game? Look at the photo above. Are you nauseated? If yes, then don't watch the game. If no, keep reading.
Look at the matchup of the two teams. Did you know these teams existed? If no, then don't watch the game. If yes, then stop playing so much NCAA on your Playstation and still don't watch the game.
CFR Prediction: Southern Miss wins thanks to a good running game and the fact that they'll play a Sun Belt team.
December 22, 2009
MAACO Bowl Las Vegas
#18 Oregon State vs. #14 BYU
A bowl featuring two ranked teams! Oh my gosh! Bowl season has begun!
No, seriously, this actually should be a pretty good game. Sadly, it features two teams that fit the definition of "pretty good." "Pretty good" means you don't lose games to teams that you're supposed to beat, but it also means that you don't upset many opponents. In this case, the greatest contribution either of these teams made to the season was BYU's defense hurting Sam Bradford. Oregon State climbed into the Top 25 by beating a series of bad teams during conference play. Really, I can't say much more about this one. Here's hoping that it's better than that Southern Miss/MTSU game...
Should I watch this game? Well, it's the first matchup of semi-decent teams during bowl season, plus it's the only football game on Tuesday. Tuesday's a pretty dry night for TV. Need proof? I'm typing this on a Tuesday. We're watching an episode of Dirty Jobs where they're working with cows that have windows in them. I am not joking. You should watch this game, if only for your sanity.
CFR Pick: I'm picking Oregon State. Oregon State was not great but they finished second in a major conference against major conference competition. BYU finished second in their conference; a minor conference with one good team. They beat Oklahoma (a win that got less and less impressive as the weeks wore on), got killed by Florida State (a loss that got worse and worse as the weeks wore on), and never stood a chance against TCU. So...that's why I'm picking Oregon State. Mind you, last season the Pac-10 was 1-5 against Mountain West teams, so I could be wrong.
December 23, 2009
San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl
#23 Utah vs. California
Another MWC/Pac-10 matchup. I imagine that these sort of things get people into seats, especially in California. Here on the east coast, however, we don't care all that much. Utah's a far cry from the dominant team of last season, and the California Golden Bears were incredibly spotty this season. This game's a bit of a toss up, depending totally on which California team shows up: The one that knocked off Stanford at Stanford? Or the one that lost 42-3 and 30-3 in consecutive weeks to Oregon and Southern Cal, respectively. Note that the teams that killed Cal were the teams that Stanford defeated later in the season. Welcome to the Pac-10, arguably the most muddled conference in the country. Utah's the third-best team in the Mountain West, which isn't really an insult when you consider that the BEST team in the Mountain West is TCU. Plus, Utah is a boring state.
Should I watch this game? Yes, since this should be a good game featuring two fairly good teams. Also, since it's not played in Utah or Ohio, the game will be in a place that doesn't suck.
CFR Pick: Cal's undefeated when unranked. I'm picking them. That is the reason why. Is it a good reason? No. But you know what? It's as likely to be right as any of the other picks.
December 24, 2009
Sheraton Hawaii Bowl
Nevada vs. Southern Methodist
You know, last year Notre Dame won this bowl, and started the year ranked because a victory in the Hawaii bowl proved that they were "back." This season, of course, proved that they were not. Southern Methodist, meanwhile, is back in its first bowl since the 1980's. For those of you who don't know, SMU is the only football program to ever get the "Death Penalty." (The fact that about 100 other teams should have gotten some sort of similar penalty is irrelevant...) SMU has finally made a partial recovery after 22 years of mediocrity. Way to go, Mustangs. As for Nevada, they're one of the better teams in the WAC. So Conference USA and the WAC get to go to Hawaii? And two major conference teams have had to go to Idaho for their bowl in the past? What the heck, man?
Should I watch this game? I doubt it. It'll just make you want to go to Hawaii, and it could lead to you becoming a fan of mediocre teams like SMU or Nevada. And no one wants that, right?
CFR Pick: Southern Methodist to win this game, then, since they won the Hawaii Bowl and had their first decent season since the '80s, Lou Holtz will pick them to win the national title in 2010.
December 26, 2009
Little Caesar's Pizza Bowl
Marshall vs. Ohio
An obscure school from West Virginia plays an unimportant school from the scar on the face of the earth known as Ohio. To add to the awfulness, the two teams play one another in Detroit. I know Michigan's been hit hard by the recession, but hard enough to host a bowl game featuring a MAC school and a .500 Conference USA school? Poor state. Oh, and as a final note, ESPN has this ranked as the worst bowl game this season. Hard to disagree with that one.
Should I watch this bowl? Are you a US interrogator? Do you need information out of an Al-Qaeda operative who won't talk? Sit him in a chair, tape open his eyes, and make him watch this game. He'll crack by the first commercial break. All other people should steer clear.
CFR Pick: My pick? The remote, so I won't have to watch this crap. As for a team to win? Ohio.
Meineke Car Care Bowl
#17 Pittsburgh vs. North Carolina
You have to feel for Pitt. They're one badly blown lead away from playing in a BCS game. Instead they wind up here, in a bowl game named for a company that is known for fixing George Foreman's brakes. Carolina, meanwhile, went on a hot streak starting the last weekend of October. Unfortunately for them, that hot streak ended the last week of the season when they lost to lowly NC State. Come to think of it, Pitt lost to NC State, too. At least they have that in common. This game will feature two teams that can really only wonder what might have been this season: Carolina fizzled early, Pitt fizzled late. Anyone else get the feeling this bowl should have been sponsored by a soda company?
Should I watch this game: Yes, especially since it's an opportunity to wash the taste of that previous one out of your mouth. Also, it'll be interesting to see if Pitt can redeem itself. The last time they beat an ACC team was September 2, 2006. The team they beat? UVa...
CFR Pick: Well, Pitt's a good team. A ranked team, even. They should defeat Carolina easily. Which is why I'm picking UNC. Carolina's lost to UVa and NC State this year. They beat Miami and Virginia Tech. The way Carolina's been playing, they'll beat the superior Pitt Panthers. Don't ask me why.
Emerald Bowl
Boston College vs. #24 Southern Cal
You know, if you'd told me at the beginning of the year that Southern Cal would wind up in a low-caliber bowl, I'd have been pleased with you, yet assumed that you know nothing of how college football works. See, stuff just happens for Southern Cal. They've been to 7 BCS bowls in the 7 seasons prior to this one. Other than their one (pronounced "one!" not "two," Coach Carroll) National Title season, the Trojans have consistently lost one game per year to the worse teams in the Pac-10. Yet the other good teams in the Pac-10 always roll over and die when Southern Cal comes to town, and SC goes to the Rose Bowl every dang year. So it's refreshing to see the Ketchup and Mustard finish tied for 5th in their conference, above only 4 teams, only one of which is headed to a bowl. Heck, had Southern Cal not played San Jose State and Notre Dame, they'd be in danger of not going bowling at all. Does this have anything to do with the bowl? No, but I just thought you'd like your weekly dose of USC hating...
Boston College, meanwhile, is an overachieving team. This doesn't mean they'll win.
Should I watch this game? It's an opportunity to see Southern Cal AND hear, inevitably, about Matt Ryan. Now, note that Matt's been out of college for 2 years now. I guarantee that if you drank a shot of whiskey each time Matt Ryan's name is said during this game that you'd be hammered by the end of the 1st quarter. I'd recommend avoiding this one, and instead playing with your day-old Christmas presents. Or nursing your day-long post-Christmas hangover.
CFR Pick: Picking Southern Cal to win, hoping that the game gets canceled when Pete Carroll's ego causes the stadium to collapse under its weight.
That's all for the first week of bowls. Keep checking back for game reviews and the week 2 preview!
Moving along, our order will be chronological, and I'll even tell you if you who I think will win, and if you should even bother to watch the bowl in question. This week's more of an appetizer than a main course. Which is regrettable, as this appetizer is like getting a chicken wing and a plate full of goo. I will leave you to determine which of the following games is the "chicken wing" in the above metaphor. We go!
December 19, 2009
New Mexico Bowl
Fresno State vs. Wyoming
Well, the first bowl of the year takes place in an obscure state between two obscure teams that roughly 7 people care about. Fresno played a challenging schedule against several good teams. Wyoming, meanwhile, played Texas close for 1 quarter, then faded to 5th in its conference, getting a bowl berth by beating similarly mediocre Colorado State in its final game. The outcome doesn't look too brilliant for the Cowboys, though they are in their first bowl since 2004. So there's something to cling to.
Should I watch this bowl? Well, if you have nothing to do on Saturday at 4:30, sure. If you have something better to do (examples: brush your teeth for 3 hours, repaint your ceiling, take a nap) then I'd say do that.
CFR pick: Fresno State should win this one. That's all I got...
St. Petersburg Bowl presented by Beef 'O' Brady's
UCF vs. Rutgers
You know, I get the feeling that bowl season would be better if the good bowls were spaced out a bit, to build the excitement. Central Florida and Rutgers play in this game which should have better quality football than Wyoming/Fresno, but is that really saying all that much? Rutgers had a pretty disappointing year, especially when one considers their 8 wins ring hollow due to their awful conference and their fairly bad non-conference schedule. The Scarlet Knights only played one major conference opponent outside of the Big East, and that opponent was Maryland; the worst team in the pretty darn bad ACC. UCF, meanwhile, played multiple good teams and lost to most of them. They did, however, beat a ranked Houston team, which is more impressive than the ranked team Rutgers beat: South Florida.
Should I watch this? Honestly? I'm going to watch this game just to hear how many times they say the sponsor's name. "Beef 'O' Brady's" is just fun to say. Do I have any idea what the heck it is? No. Which is another reason to watch! Oh, you want a valid football reason to watch this game? There are none unless you're a Rutgers or UCF fan. Condolences if you are, by the way.
CFR pick: I'm picking Central Florida for the upset. I am going to watch this game only because I love you, dear readers, and I am willing to punish myself for your entertainment.
December 20, 2009
R+L Carriers New Orleans Bowl
Southern Mississippi vs. Middle Tennessee State
I love bowl season. As I understand it, it's a feast of football. Unfortunately, these first three games serve as atrocious appetizers. It'd be like going to a swanky restaurant and having someone offer you fish heads as your appetizer. Sure, you'll be getting filet mignon after a bit, but the fish heads are hard to swallow. This particular bowl, for example, features two middling teams from two middling conferences. At least the diversity in play style will be nice: MTSU is a defensive team, while Southern Miss is offensively minded. Unfortunately, to watch this game one must look directly at Southern Miss's bright yellow unis, which can cause blindness, as shown below:
Sorry, folks. I had to warn you, though...
Should I watch this game? Look at the photo above. Are you nauseated? If yes, then don't watch the game. If no, keep reading.
Look at the matchup of the two teams. Did you know these teams existed? If no, then don't watch the game. If yes, then stop playing so much NCAA on your Playstation and still don't watch the game.
CFR Prediction: Southern Miss wins thanks to a good running game and the fact that they'll play a Sun Belt team.
December 22, 2009
MAACO Bowl Las Vegas
#18 Oregon State vs. #14 BYU
A bowl featuring two ranked teams! Oh my gosh! Bowl season has begun!
No, seriously, this actually should be a pretty good game. Sadly, it features two teams that fit the definition of "pretty good." "Pretty good" means you don't lose games to teams that you're supposed to beat, but it also means that you don't upset many opponents. In this case, the greatest contribution either of these teams made to the season was BYU's defense hurting Sam Bradford. Oregon State climbed into the Top 25 by beating a series of bad teams during conference play. Really, I can't say much more about this one. Here's hoping that it's better than that Southern Miss/MTSU game...
Should I watch this game? Well, it's the first matchup of semi-decent teams during bowl season, plus it's the only football game on Tuesday. Tuesday's a pretty dry night for TV. Need proof? I'm typing this on a Tuesday. We're watching an episode of Dirty Jobs where they're working with cows that have windows in them. I am not joking. You should watch this game, if only for your sanity.
CFR Pick: I'm picking Oregon State. Oregon State was not great but they finished second in a major conference against major conference competition. BYU finished second in their conference; a minor conference with one good team. They beat Oklahoma (a win that got less and less impressive as the weeks wore on), got killed by Florida State (a loss that got worse and worse as the weeks wore on), and never stood a chance against TCU. So...that's why I'm picking Oregon State. Mind you, last season the Pac-10 was 1-5 against Mountain West teams, so I could be wrong.
December 23, 2009
San Diego County Credit Union Poinsettia Bowl
#23 Utah vs. California
Another MWC/Pac-10 matchup. I imagine that these sort of things get people into seats, especially in California. Here on the east coast, however, we don't care all that much. Utah's a far cry from the dominant team of last season, and the California Golden Bears were incredibly spotty this season. This game's a bit of a toss up, depending totally on which California team shows up: The one that knocked off Stanford at Stanford? Or the one that lost 42-3 and 30-3 in consecutive weeks to Oregon and Southern Cal, respectively. Note that the teams that killed Cal were the teams that Stanford defeated later in the season. Welcome to the Pac-10, arguably the most muddled conference in the country. Utah's the third-best team in the Mountain West, which isn't really an insult when you consider that the BEST team in the Mountain West is TCU. Plus, Utah is a boring state.
Should I watch this game? Yes, since this should be a good game featuring two fairly good teams. Also, since it's not played in Utah or Ohio, the game will be in a place that doesn't suck.
CFR Pick: Cal's undefeated when unranked. I'm picking them. That is the reason why. Is it a good reason? No. But you know what? It's as likely to be right as any of the other picks.
December 24, 2009
Sheraton Hawaii Bowl
Nevada vs. Southern Methodist
You know, last year Notre Dame won this bowl, and started the year ranked because a victory in the Hawaii bowl proved that they were "back." This season, of course, proved that they were not. Southern Methodist, meanwhile, is back in its first bowl since the 1980's. For those of you who don't know, SMU is the only football program to ever get the "Death Penalty." (The fact that about 100 other teams should have gotten some sort of similar penalty is irrelevant...) SMU has finally made a partial recovery after 22 years of mediocrity. Way to go, Mustangs. As for Nevada, they're one of the better teams in the WAC. So Conference USA and the WAC get to go to Hawaii? And two major conference teams have had to go to Idaho for their bowl in the past? What the heck, man?
Should I watch this game? I doubt it. It'll just make you want to go to Hawaii, and it could lead to you becoming a fan of mediocre teams like SMU or Nevada. And no one wants that, right?
CFR Pick: Southern Methodist to win this game, then, since they won the Hawaii Bowl and had their first decent season since the '80s, Lou Holtz will pick them to win the national title in 2010.
December 26, 2009
Little Caesar's Pizza Bowl
Marshall vs. Ohio
An obscure school from West Virginia plays an unimportant school from the scar on the face of the earth known as Ohio. To add to the awfulness, the two teams play one another in Detroit. I know Michigan's been hit hard by the recession, but hard enough to host a bowl game featuring a MAC school and a .500 Conference USA school? Poor state. Oh, and as a final note, ESPN has this ranked as the worst bowl game this season. Hard to disagree with that one.
Should I watch this bowl? Are you a US interrogator? Do you need information out of an Al-Qaeda operative who won't talk? Sit him in a chair, tape open his eyes, and make him watch this game. He'll crack by the first commercial break. All other people should steer clear.
CFR Pick: My pick? The remote, so I won't have to watch this crap. As for a team to win? Ohio.
Meineke Car Care Bowl
#17 Pittsburgh vs. North Carolina
You have to feel for Pitt. They're one badly blown lead away from playing in a BCS game. Instead they wind up here, in a bowl game named for a company that is known for fixing George Foreman's brakes. Carolina, meanwhile, went on a hot streak starting the last weekend of October. Unfortunately for them, that hot streak ended the last week of the season when they lost to lowly NC State. Come to think of it, Pitt lost to NC State, too. At least they have that in common. This game will feature two teams that can really only wonder what might have been this season: Carolina fizzled early, Pitt fizzled late. Anyone else get the feeling this bowl should have been sponsored by a soda company?
Should I watch this game: Yes, especially since it's an opportunity to wash the taste of that previous one out of your mouth. Also, it'll be interesting to see if Pitt can redeem itself. The last time they beat an ACC team was September 2, 2006. The team they beat? UVa...
CFR Pick: Well, Pitt's a good team. A ranked team, even. They should defeat Carolina easily. Which is why I'm picking UNC. Carolina's lost to UVa and NC State this year. They beat Miami and Virginia Tech. The way Carolina's been playing, they'll beat the superior Pitt Panthers. Don't ask me why.
Emerald Bowl
Boston College vs. #24 Southern Cal
You know, if you'd told me at the beginning of the year that Southern Cal would wind up in a low-caliber bowl, I'd have been pleased with you, yet assumed that you know nothing of how college football works. See, stuff just happens for Southern Cal. They've been to 7 BCS bowls in the 7 seasons prior to this one. Other than their one (pronounced "one!" not "two," Coach Carroll) National Title season, the Trojans have consistently lost one game per year to the worse teams in the Pac-10. Yet the other good teams in the Pac-10 always roll over and die when Southern Cal comes to town, and SC goes to the Rose Bowl every dang year. So it's refreshing to see the Ketchup and Mustard finish tied for 5th in their conference, above only 4 teams, only one of which is headed to a bowl. Heck, had Southern Cal not played San Jose State and Notre Dame, they'd be in danger of not going bowling at all. Does this have anything to do with the bowl? No, but I just thought you'd like your weekly dose of USC hating...
Boston College, meanwhile, is an overachieving team. This doesn't mean they'll win.
Should I watch this game? It's an opportunity to see Southern Cal AND hear, inevitably, about Matt Ryan. Now, note that Matt's been out of college for 2 years now. I guarantee that if you drank a shot of whiskey each time Matt Ryan's name is said during this game that you'd be hammered by the end of the 1st quarter. I'd recommend avoiding this one, and instead playing with your day-old Christmas presents. Or nursing your day-long post-Christmas hangover.
CFR Pick: Picking Southern Cal to win, hoping that the game gets canceled when Pete Carroll's ego causes the stadium to collapse under its weight.
That's all for the first week of bowls. Keep checking back for game reviews and the week 2 preview!
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Saturday in Review: Conference Championship Edition!
The last "normal" Saturday of the year featured arguably the best games all season, and my favorite team wasn't even playing! Let's review these games:
#1 Florida-13, #2 Alabama-32
Well, I'll admit that this one surprised me more than a little. I did expect Alabama to win, but I did not expect to see a 19 point defeat of the Swamp Lizards. 'Bama's quarterback, McElroy, looked very good against a normally excellent Florida defense that was depleted by the loss of Carlos Dunlap, their best pass-defender. Throw Mark Ingram into the mix, and you had a combination that kept the Gators defense out of sync for most of the game.
It wasn't for lack of trying on the commentators' part, as CBS's resident Florida fans Gary Danielson and Verne Lundquist did their darndest to root for the Gators directly from the press box. Every time Alabama did something, Verne practically spat out the play call. Maybe he had money on the game. Or he'd been drinking again, I dunno. Either way, it was interesting to hear the announcers talk about how great of a warrior and a champion Tim Tebow is, even though Tebow had a distinctly average (not bad, just average) game.
Look, this was probably the most watched college football game thus far this season, so the odds favor that you actually saw this game and are reading this bit solely to humor me. We'll move on to bigger, better, more interesting things after this brief blurb: Alabama's defense looked excellent, and the Tide look to be heavy favorites in the National Title game against Texas. Speaking of Texas...
#3 Texas-13, #22 Nebraska-12
Well, the Longhorns are in the BCS Title game, a fact that is almost entirely due to their preseason ranking coupled with their anemic conference and their pathetic non-conference schedule. Don't get me wrong, there were six teams that were undefeated coming into championship weekend: Alabama, Florida, Texas, Cincinnati, Boise State, and TCU. Of those, only Florida and Alabama don't play in an awful conference. Only Alabama, Cincinnati, and Boise played ranked non-conference teams. My point? Well, in a season like this one, preseason rankings basically determined the National Championship matchup way back in August. There was no way any of us could have known that, but it's true. Had Cincinnati or TCU started the year a wee bit higher, then they would be in the title game and Texas would be on the outside looking in. It's just the way things go in the not-at-all-adequate method that college football uses to determine its champion.
Still, one wonders how the Longhorns will fare against an SEC defense. Colt McCoy is an excellent quarterback, but the Nebraska defense and the monster known as Ndamukong Suh, wreaked havoc on the Longhorns offensive line all night. Alabama certainly doesn't have anyone as good as Suh on its defensive line, but their all-around D might be better than Nebraska's, a thought which should terrify the Longhorn faithful.
I suppose some analysis is in order. I mean, it's what I don't get paid to do here, right? If Nebraska had something, anything, resembling a competent offense, then we'd be looking at a different score here. That's not an insult to Nebraska, they just have no offense. Look no further than the Virginia Tech game, where the Nebraska defense was superior to the Hokie offense on all but one drive, yet the Huskers lost the game because all 15 of their points came on field goals. The same can be said here, with all 12 points coming on the leg of Alex Henery. Some of these Nebraska scoring drives started ridiculously close to Texas's end zone. When a team starts a drive on the opposing team's 10 yard line, more than 3 points should result!
And, finally, there was the penultimate play. You all know what I'm talking about: Colt McCoy's inexplicable roll out on a play that started with 7 ticks left on the clock, his waiting to throw the ball until the last possible second, and the fact that the clock did at one point read 0:00. All of that happened while Texas was within field goal range and (here's the weird part) still had a timeout left! The refs did make the right call, as much as it pains me to say it. There was still 1 second left on the clock when the ball hit the ground, and Texas was completely entitled to the field goal attempt that they received. This is, however, an example of those seconds that mysteriously disappear during football games. Who knows how many times a ball gets thrown away and a second sneaks off the game clock. Moments like this are enough to make one wonder.
Any hoo, Texas's kick was good (barely) and the BCS was saved the embarrassment of having either a minor conference team (unthinkable!) or a Big East team (never!) or a Florida/Alabama rematch (honestly, probably what would have happened if Verne Lundquist ran the BCS) in the National Title game.
The best part of the postgame? The Texas players, especially those on offense, leaping about as though they'd accomplished something at the end of the game. 15 of the yards on the game winning drive were from a horse-collar tackle. The offense did almost nothing the entire night. And, here's the best bit, you beat a team that you were favored to beat by 14 by a grand total of a point. Yes, you've done so much. (NOTE: I'm being a bit extreme here. Texas is undefeated, and their offense did look good in many of their games this season. But if they think they can play the way they did on Saturday and defeat Alabama, then they are in for a bitter disappointment)
My question (which all UNC fans who still feel betrayed by Mack Brown will appreciate) is this: WHAT THE FRICK WAS THE TEXAS COACHING STAFF THINKING!?!?! Seriously, you have a shot at a title game sitting in front of you, and you choose to run a play that can very easily backfire. Nebraska's defense had hounded McCoy all night; what if they'd gotten to him? Texas's kicker hit the field goal with about half a foot of clearance to spare, meaning a sack probably results in a loss. What if the pass had been thrown and then picked off? What if the pass was completed, but thanks to slow play development the clock ran out? What if McCoy's toss had hung in the air for a second longer? That's too many factors to risk! Mack must have been wondering what to wear in Pasadena, because he sure as heck wasn't thinking of football when this play ran through his headset and was somehow approved. If Texas does somehow win the National Title, remember this play, because it will remind you just how thin the margin between championships and Cotton Bowls can be.
Yet we base our bowl system mostly (key word there, mostly) on reality rather than "what ifs" and thus does Texas skip merrily into the title game. Hats off to Nebraska for playing Texas tightly, and look for the Huskers to keep making waves in the Big 12, especially since they bother to play defense in a conference that long forgot what the 7-letter "d-word" means.
#5 Cincinnati-45, #15 Pittsburgh-44
Another near-upset turns out to be a...set. Is that the proper term for a non-upset? Or would that be a downset? Oh, well. Pitt loses at home due to a missed extra point of all things. Mind you, before we're too hasty on the kicker, let's not forget that Pitt blew a 21 point lead. And that one isn't the kicker's fault, now is it?
Congrats to Cincinnati on the undefeated season, though the afore mentioned clock management issue in the Big 12 Championship game means that the Bearcats (still an awful mascot) will not be competing for a national title. Less of a pity than a sad dose of reality. Though that sad dose of reality might turn into an overdose if Brian Kelly splits Cincinnati for Notre Dame. On one hand, I can see why Coach Kelly might stay: Secure job, the satisfaction of winning with a program he built, and a cupcake conference help. But Notre Dame has money, tradition, and (most importantly) is not in Ohio, making it a very appealing place. Either way, congrats to Cincy! Enjoy your beating by Florida in the Sugar Bowl. If Coach Kelly leaves, it might be your last BCS showing for a looooooong time.
New Mexico State-7, #6 Boise State-42
The number six team in the country beats the second worst team in its godawful conference by 35 at home. You really want a review of that? Didn't think so.
#16 Oregon State-33, #7 Oregon-37
You know, Oregon is actually a pretty good football team. I did not think, after that disaster in Boise back in September, that I'd be typing that. The Ducks deserved to win the weakened Pac-10, and they did so with a close win over their rivals.
Oregon State, meanwhile, nearly won the conference while garnering practically no attention whatsoever from the national media. Perhaps that's the key to success, as attention seems to lead to defeat at least once a season. (See also: Southern Cal every single year of the Pete Carroll era)
It will be interesting to see how the Pac-10 performs this bowl season, as they've beaten up heavily on one another during the regular season, with no one team looking that impressive. I suppose we'll see. One thing I do know: Not a single team in the conference plays defense at all. That could very well hurt come bowl time...
#10 Georgia Tech-39, Clemson-34
A real shootout between teams that lost last week. Pity that Georgia Tech won, I'd love to see the BCS explain Clemson getting into the Orange Bowl while Virginia Tech, the highest ranked team in the conference, went to play in the Chick-Fil-A Bowl.
Despite my above comment, I am actually glad that the Yellow Jackets and their illegal cut blocks/really awesome run attack won. It would have looked really bad for the conference to have had its highest ranked team lose to its rival then lose to an unranked school in the championship.
This game was actually pretty good. Just so long as you ignore the fact that these two were the best teams in the ACC, yet they'd be the 5th and 7th best teams in the SEC. Neither team brought a defense to the game, and the result was a high-flying scoring bonanza. Georgia Tech is headed to the Orange Bowl as the ACC's lone BCS team, while Clemson gets the honor of playing Kentucky in the Music City Bowl...
Arizona-21, #18 USC-17
Ahem...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
OK, let's try and analyze this one. Southern Cal runs up the score on a helpless UCLA squad, and then gets beaten at home by Arizona. The Men of Troy have gone from perennial power to 5th place in a 10 team conference. When you factor in that this conference includes the cupcake known as Washington State, this year was a massive disappointment for the Trojans.
Southern Cal deserved this, and frankly I hope Boston College smacks them around in their bowl.
Arizona, meanwhile, was a surprise this season. Way to go, Wildcats! After, like, 5 years of being predicted to do something, you finally finished higher than 4th in the conference!
#19 California-10, Washington-42
California's record as a ranked team: 5-4
Cal's record as an unranked team: 3-0
Washington's record against teams from California: 2-2
Washington's record against other states: 3-5
There's some weird facts for you. I figure I'd be equal and give y'all facts for both the teams. I look forward to watching Cal win their bowl, since they're playing Utah and they're unranked. Washington, meanwhile, beat 2 ranked teams this season, and they've been fairly mediocre in all their other games. Movin' right along...
#21 Houston-32, ECU-38
Houston's quarterback Case Keenum is really really good at throwing the football. Unfortunately for Mr. Keenum, the Houston defense sucks. The result? Games like this one, which featured Houston doing next to nothing defensively, and allowing ECU to pull the upset against Conference-USA's reigning hype machine.
ECU has won the conference for the second year, and will be headed to the run down slag heap known as the "Liberty Bowl" as a reward. The bowl has plenty of prestige, but the stadium is in awful shape. Houston will be playing in the Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl (I didn't make that one up!) against Air Force.
I wonder, even though Houston is favored, is it an upset if the Cougars win? Air Force clearly has the favor of the bowl's sponsor and the bowl's name. Idle wondering, I suppose. Let's move along...
#23 West Virginia-24, Rutgers-21
Special thanks to the Big East conference for allowing us to watch their mediocre brand of football when the larger conferences have championship games.
West Virginia's not been so great this year, and Rutgers has been awful. Look, I'm taking it slower this week. The last two took it out of me, and bowl season's taxing on everyone!
Still, here's one last look at the Bottom 95:
On Thursday, Western Kentucky completed the imperfect season. 0-12! Harder, apparently, than going 12-0...Central Michigan beat Ohio for the MAC championship. No one, not even the MAC, cares...Fresno State beat Illinois on a two point conversion that was caught by an offensive lineman. That's my nominee for Play of the Year...Wisconsin crushed Hawaii...UConn beat South Florida in a snowy game in Connecticut, which seems a bit unfair to the Tampa-based Bulls...
During the next week, Army/Navy analysis, Bowl Previews, and some coaching commentary. Stay tuned for partial excitement!
#1 Florida-13, #2 Alabama-32
Well, I'll admit that this one surprised me more than a little. I did expect Alabama to win, but I did not expect to see a 19 point defeat of the Swamp Lizards. 'Bama's quarterback, McElroy, looked very good against a normally excellent Florida defense that was depleted by the loss of Carlos Dunlap, their best pass-defender. Throw Mark Ingram into the mix, and you had a combination that kept the Gators defense out of sync for most of the game.
It wasn't for lack of trying on the commentators' part, as CBS's resident Florida fans Gary Danielson and Verne Lundquist did their darndest to root for the Gators directly from the press box. Every time Alabama did something, Verne practically spat out the play call. Maybe he had money on the game. Or he'd been drinking again, I dunno. Either way, it was interesting to hear the announcers talk about how great of a warrior and a champion Tim Tebow is, even though Tebow had a distinctly average (not bad, just average) game.
Look, this was probably the most watched college football game thus far this season, so the odds favor that you actually saw this game and are reading this bit solely to humor me. We'll move on to bigger, better, more interesting things after this brief blurb: Alabama's defense looked excellent, and the Tide look to be heavy favorites in the National Title game against Texas. Speaking of Texas...
#3 Texas-13, #22 Nebraska-12
Well, the Longhorns are in the BCS Title game, a fact that is almost entirely due to their preseason ranking coupled with their anemic conference and their pathetic non-conference schedule. Don't get me wrong, there were six teams that were undefeated coming into championship weekend: Alabama, Florida, Texas, Cincinnati, Boise State, and TCU. Of those, only Florida and Alabama don't play in an awful conference. Only Alabama, Cincinnati, and Boise played ranked non-conference teams. My point? Well, in a season like this one, preseason rankings basically determined the National Championship matchup way back in August. There was no way any of us could have known that, but it's true. Had Cincinnati or TCU started the year a wee bit higher, then they would be in the title game and Texas would be on the outside looking in. It's just the way things go in the not-at-all-adequate method that college football uses to determine its champion.
Still, one wonders how the Longhorns will fare against an SEC defense. Colt McCoy is an excellent quarterback, but the Nebraska defense and the monster known as Ndamukong Suh, wreaked havoc on the Longhorns offensive line all night. Alabama certainly doesn't have anyone as good as Suh on its defensive line, but their all-around D might be better than Nebraska's, a thought which should terrify the Longhorn faithful.
I suppose some analysis is in order. I mean, it's what I don't get paid to do here, right? If Nebraska had something, anything, resembling a competent offense, then we'd be looking at a different score here. That's not an insult to Nebraska, they just have no offense. Look no further than the Virginia Tech game, where the Nebraska defense was superior to the Hokie offense on all but one drive, yet the Huskers lost the game because all 15 of their points came on field goals. The same can be said here, with all 12 points coming on the leg of Alex Henery. Some of these Nebraska scoring drives started ridiculously close to Texas's end zone. When a team starts a drive on the opposing team's 10 yard line, more than 3 points should result!
And, finally, there was the penultimate play. You all know what I'm talking about: Colt McCoy's inexplicable roll out on a play that started with 7 ticks left on the clock, his waiting to throw the ball until the last possible second, and the fact that the clock did at one point read 0:00. All of that happened while Texas was within field goal range and (here's the weird part) still had a timeout left! The refs did make the right call, as much as it pains me to say it. There was still 1 second left on the clock when the ball hit the ground, and Texas was completely entitled to the field goal attempt that they received. This is, however, an example of those seconds that mysteriously disappear during football games. Who knows how many times a ball gets thrown away and a second sneaks off the game clock. Moments like this are enough to make one wonder.
Any hoo, Texas's kick was good (barely) and the BCS was saved the embarrassment of having either a minor conference team (unthinkable!) or a Big East team (never!) or a Florida/Alabama rematch (honestly, probably what would have happened if Verne Lundquist ran the BCS) in the National Title game.
The best part of the postgame? The Texas players, especially those on offense, leaping about as though they'd accomplished something at the end of the game. 15 of the yards on the game winning drive were from a horse-collar tackle. The offense did almost nothing the entire night. And, here's the best bit, you beat a team that you were favored to beat by 14 by a grand total of a point. Yes, you've done so much. (NOTE: I'm being a bit extreme here. Texas is undefeated, and their offense did look good in many of their games this season. But if they think they can play the way they did on Saturday and defeat Alabama, then they are in for a bitter disappointment)
My question (which all UNC fans who still feel betrayed by Mack Brown will appreciate) is this: WHAT THE FRICK WAS THE TEXAS COACHING STAFF THINKING!?!?! Seriously, you have a shot at a title game sitting in front of you, and you choose to run a play that can very easily backfire. Nebraska's defense had hounded McCoy all night; what if they'd gotten to him? Texas's kicker hit the field goal with about half a foot of clearance to spare, meaning a sack probably results in a loss. What if the pass had been thrown and then picked off? What if the pass was completed, but thanks to slow play development the clock ran out? What if McCoy's toss had hung in the air for a second longer? That's too many factors to risk! Mack must have been wondering what to wear in Pasadena, because he sure as heck wasn't thinking of football when this play ran through his headset and was somehow approved. If Texas does somehow win the National Title, remember this play, because it will remind you just how thin the margin between championships and Cotton Bowls can be.
Yet we base our bowl system mostly (key word there, mostly) on reality rather than "what ifs" and thus does Texas skip merrily into the title game. Hats off to Nebraska for playing Texas tightly, and look for the Huskers to keep making waves in the Big 12, especially since they bother to play defense in a conference that long forgot what the 7-letter "d-word" means.
#5 Cincinnati-45, #15 Pittsburgh-44
Another near-upset turns out to be a...set. Is that the proper term for a non-upset? Or would that be a downset? Oh, well. Pitt loses at home due to a missed extra point of all things. Mind you, before we're too hasty on the kicker, let's not forget that Pitt blew a 21 point lead. And that one isn't the kicker's fault, now is it?
Congrats to Cincinnati on the undefeated season, though the afore mentioned clock management issue in the Big 12 Championship game means that the Bearcats (still an awful mascot) will not be competing for a national title. Less of a pity than a sad dose of reality. Though that sad dose of reality might turn into an overdose if Brian Kelly splits Cincinnati for Notre Dame. On one hand, I can see why Coach Kelly might stay: Secure job, the satisfaction of winning with a program he built, and a cupcake conference help. But Notre Dame has money, tradition, and (most importantly) is not in Ohio, making it a very appealing place. Either way, congrats to Cincy! Enjoy your beating by Florida in the Sugar Bowl. If Coach Kelly leaves, it might be your last BCS showing for a looooooong time.
New Mexico State-7, #6 Boise State-42
The number six team in the country beats the second worst team in its godawful conference by 35 at home. You really want a review of that? Didn't think so.
#16 Oregon State-33, #7 Oregon-37
You know, Oregon is actually a pretty good football team. I did not think, after that disaster in Boise back in September, that I'd be typing that. The Ducks deserved to win the weakened Pac-10, and they did so with a close win over their rivals.
Oregon State, meanwhile, nearly won the conference while garnering practically no attention whatsoever from the national media. Perhaps that's the key to success, as attention seems to lead to defeat at least once a season. (See also: Southern Cal every single year of the Pete Carroll era)
It will be interesting to see how the Pac-10 performs this bowl season, as they've beaten up heavily on one another during the regular season, with no one team looking that impressive. I suppose we'll see. One thing I do know: Not a single team in the conference plays defense at all. That could very well hurt come bowl time...
#10 Georgia Tech-39, Clemson-34
A real shootout between teams that lost last week. Pity that Georgia Tech won, I'd love to see the BCS explain Clemson getting into the Orange Bowl while Virginia Tech, the highest ranked team in the conference, went to play in the Chick-Fil-A Bowl.
Despite my above comment, I am actually glad that the Yellow Jackets and their illegal cut blocks/really awesome run attack won. It would have looked really bad for the conference to have had its highest ranked team lose to its rival then lose to an unranked school in the championship.
This game was actually pretty good. Just so long as you ignore the fact that these two were the best teams in the ACC, yet they'd be the 5th and 7th best teams in the SEC. Neither team brought a defense to the game, and the result was a high-flying scoring bonanza. Georgia Tech is headed to the Orange Bowl as the ACC's lone BCS team, while Clemson gets the honor of playing Kentucky in the Music City Bowl...
Arizona-21, #18 USC-17
Ahem...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
OK, let's try and analyze this one. Southern Cal runs up the score on a helpless UCLA squad, and then gets beaten at home by Arizona. The Men of Troy have gone from perennial power to 5th place in a 10 team conference. When you factor in that this conference includes the cupcake known as Washington State, this year was a massive disappointment for the Trojans.
Southern Cal deserved this, and frankly I hope Boston College smacks them around in their bowl.
Arizona, meanwhile, was a surprise this season. Way to go, Wildcats! After, like, 5 years of being predicted to do something, you finally finished higher than 4th in the conference!
#19 California-10, Washington-42
California's record as a ranked team: 5-4
Cal's record as an unranked team: 3-0
Washington's record against teams from California: 2-2
Washington's record against other states: 3-5
There's some weird facts for you. I figure I'd be equal and give y'all facts for both the teams. I look forward to watching Cal win their bowl, since they're playing Utah and they're unranked. Washington, meanwhile, beat 2 ranked teams this season, and they've been fairly mediocre in all their other games. Movin' right along...
#21 Houston-32, ECU-38
Houston's quarterback Case Keenum is really really good at throwing the football. Unfortunately for Mr. Keenum, the Houston defense sucks. The result? Games like this one, which featured Houston doing next to nothing defensively, and allowing ECU to pull the upset against Conference-USA's reigning hype machine.
ECU has won the conference for the second year, and will be headed to the run down slag heap known as the "Liberty Bowl" as a reward. The bowl has plenty of prestige, but the stadium is in awful shape. Houston will be playing in the Bell Helicopter Armed Forces Bowl (I didn't make that one up!) against Air Force.
I wonder, even though Houston is favored, is it an upset if the Cougars win? Air Force clearly has the favor of the bowl's sponsor and the bowl's name. Idle wondering, I suppose. Let's move along...
#23 West Virginia-24, Rutgers-21
Special thanks to the Big East conference for allowing us to watch their mediocre brand of football when the larger conferences have championship games.
West Virginia's not been so great this year, and Rutgers has been awful. Look, I'm taking it slower this week. The last two took it out of me, and bowl season's taxing on everyone!
Still, here's one last look at the Bottom 95:
On Thursday, Western Kentucky completed the imperfect season. 0-12! Harder, apparently, than going 12-0...Central Michigan beat Ohio for the MAC championship. No one, not even the MAC, cares...Fresno State beat Illinois on a two point conversion that was caught by an offensive lineman. That's my nominee for Play of the Year...Wisconsin crushed Hawaii...UConn beat South Florida in a snowy game in Connecticut, which seems a bit unfair to the Tampa-based Bulls...
During the next week, Army/Navy analysis, Bowl Previews, and some coaching commentary. Stay tuned for partial excitement!
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